Friday, 29 September 2006

A Circle of Fragile Wallets in Kinokuniya

Note to self: DO NOT go to Kinokuniya on the exact same day your salary comes in.

I made that 'mistake' today, and ended up spending close to 200 bucks on a few books,

At first I was only there to pick up a Japan Lonely Planet book, but then I made the mistake of walking over to the fantasy section and seeing this:


Godammit, I didn't even know Gaiman had a new book out until. And suffice to say, I immedietely grabbed it. And to think I wanted to buy the new Terry Brooks book (Armageddon's Children) instead at first...

Note to self again: DO NOT go to Kinokuniya on the exact same day your salary comes in, or you'll end up grabbing books of shelves without any kind of hesitation.

Then, there was this book:



I'm finishing The 13 and 1/2 Lives of Captain Bluebear soon, and I liked the craziness of that bok so much that I picked this up as soon as I could.

Oh, and my monthly graphic novel fix this month is this:



My friend recommended Kabuki to me ages ago, but I had not seen the first book (Circle of Blood) in Kino until now, so I decided to get it this time around before it disappeared again.

Now, as elated as I am with all my new books, it is also time for me to nurse my sore wallet now. And Wintersmith isn't even out yet...

:-( :-(

Thursday, 28 September 2006

Fireangel and the Lame Anime Story

FireAngel: omg dying.
FireAngel: need tonnes of distraction but i can't focus on work.
eyeris: peanut butter jelly time!
eyeris: peanut butter jelly time!
eyeris: peanut butter jelly time!
FireAngel: there ya go there ya go!
eyeris: peanut butter jelly with a baseball bat!
eyeris: peanut butter jelly with a baseball bat!
eyeris: peanut butter jelly with a baseball bat!
FireAngel: hahaha not working.
eyeris: damn, not working huh?
eyeris: must change tactik
eyeris: hehe
FireAngel: not workingggggggggggggg.
FireAngel: next netx nexttttttt
FireAngel: tell me a story!
eyeris: oh dear
eyeris: remember the last time i told you a story?


once upon a time, there was this Naruto dude. He was walking along the street (or rather, jumping along) and he saw this hugeass bottle of Sake.

FireAngel: jumping. lol. then

Then, being the busybody he is, he decided to climb up the bottle (it was a REALLY HUGE ASS bottle). When he got to the top, he saw this orange haired dude all dressed in black, eating some sushi.

There being not much space on top of the bottle, Naruto decided to tell the orange haired dude to get the f*ck out.

FireAngel: ICHIGO! AHAKS.
FireAngel: THENNNNNNN!

"Oi oi, baka, get the f*ck outdatebayor" said Naruto. "i want to drink the sake".

The orange haired dude looked at him, then said, "baka, you wanna come up, come and fight me lar"

FireAngel: WAhkakakakka... english mix jap damn best

so Naruto, biasalar, damn gian wanna fight wan. (ever since Sasuke dissappeared, Naruto's had no one to fight. Those enemies in the fillers damn char siew wan), so he go fight lor.

FireAngel: CHAR SIEW! HAHA THEN

but wait, the orange hair guy not yet even tell name, Naruto attack oledi. So the orange haired dude roll his eyes, and then drew out this HUGEASS SABRE, ALL BLACK WAN.

Naruto took one look at it, and decided to use his kagebunshin nojutsu. Suddenly HUNDREDS of Narutos appeared!

But then hor, because there is no space on top of the sake bottle. all the kagebunshin fell down and dissappeared. Left with the original Naruto standing there looking sheepish.

FireAngel: HAhahah what a dumbasssss!

so. Just as the orange hair dude was going to chop Naruto into charsiew, suddenly there was a HUGE puff of smoke!

FireAngel: oooooooh

both naruto and ichigo were so terkejut that they had to jump off the sake bottle and were left hanging on the edge, and when the smoke cleared.... there was one person standing in the middle.... or rather, SOMETHING was standing in the middle...

jeng jeng jeng...
it was...
JENG JENG JENG....

FireAngel: FROG BOSS?

....GODZILLA!!!!!!!!

FireAngel: WTFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFffffffffffffffff
Eyeris: You can tell this story is pretty muh out of whack, ahaha

So it was that Godzilla appeared on top of the bottle of sake, and Ichigo and Naruto were left hanging off the edges. Thankfully for them, all Godzilla wanted was to stomp some buildings and not drink sake, so the fella jumped off the bottle of sake and went to stomp Tokyo.

FireAngel: -_-"""""''''''
eyeris: lamest story on earth!
FireAngel: no ending one?

ok, now that the top of the bottle of sake was empty, Ichigo and naruto climbed back up. But lo and behold, there was this cun chick sitting there, staring at them...

FireAngel: HARRRRRRRrrrrrrrrr
FireAngel: suddenly
FireAngel: from nowhere!


"eh, how come suddenly you here wan?" asked Ichigo.

The cun chick said, "Oh, that godzilla hor, just now he was fighting King Kong somewhere, then suddenly from nowhere some stupid wizard wave a wand at him, then POOF both of us disappeared and appeared here"

FireAngel: then then then
FireAngel: ?!??!
FireAngel: both of us?
FireAngel: she was a kingkong + godzilla spawn? wtf.
eyeris: the girl and godzilla la. -_-"
FireAngel: ALIEN!!!!1one.
FireAngel: oh oh ohhhhh..
FireAngel: then then then


"Eh, what were you doing in the middle of a king kong and godzilla fight lardatebayor?" asked Naruto.

"Oh, at first I thought they were fighting over me. but then I found out they were both gay, and they were actually fighting over ultraman. I just HAPPENED to be there" she said sheepishly.

FireAngel: omg
FireAngel: wahkakakaka


"So, you two baka want to fight over me instead?" asked the girl.

So, Inchigo and Naruto looked at each other, then back at the girl, and then at the bottle of sake; and then together, they said, "Nah, we'd rather just drink the sake", and booted the girl off the bottle.

FireAngel: SAKE!
FireAngel: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
FireAngel: PWN!


and then they looked at each other again....

FireAngel: FIGHT!

and then Ihicgo said, "Eh, I damn tired oledi lar. first that Godzilla come, then that girl come, I damn potong stim oledi. lazy to fight liao. Seee, my sword also lazy oledi."

Then Naruto said, "yalar. just now that nine-tail fox damn gian wanna fight wan. but now he also potong stim go back to sleep oledi"

FireAngel: sian

"I know I know! lets play rock paper scissors! Who win get to drink the sake!" said Naruto. so Ichigo, thought about it for a while, and agreed.

"ONE... TWO..." said Naruto, when both of them had their hands behind their backs...

"And THREE!!!" shouted Naruto, pulling his hands out from behind his back, revealing a 'paper' sign.

And at the same time, Inchigo pulled out his BIG MOTHERF**KING BLACK SABRE and CHOPPED Naruto in half and kicked both halves off the bottle.

As he looked down at the falling Naruto halves, he posed with his sword, very cool pose, and said, "Sorry baka. Sword beats paper. "

THE END.

eyeris: gyahaha
eyeris: eh, no applause?
eyeris: sien
eyeris: i feel so under appreciated
FireAngel: *APPLAUSE* APPLAUSE*!!!!!!!11111one
FireAngel: lol

Wednesday, 27 September 2006

Durin's Bane Spreads Its Plastic Wings

Yesterday, I had to go to 1 Utama to pick up something. Something I'd been WAITING for for AGES and AGES.

Something in a box so big that it couldn't fit in my car's trunk:



In the end, I had to put it in the back seat.

Anyway, as soon as I got home, I opened the box, and took out the contents:




Then I took away the rest of the packaging and ended up with this:




After that, I assembled it:

Balrog fix

And added either a sword or a whip to it:

balrog sword

And after all that, what did I get in the end?

THIS massive dude:




Yup, it's the 25" Lord of the Rings BALROG action figure, made by toy company NECA, and is definitely the most AWESOME LOTR action figure EVAR MADE!!!!!

I've been waiting YEARS for this fella to be made and it's finally here, in my house! WOOHOO!

Exactly how awesome is this fella? Well, this fella could kick Gandalf's ASS to Rivendell and back!

I mean, just check out how big he is compared to a can of Chang beer!



His Wingspan is the length of SIX Terry Pratchett books!



Heck, the Balrog is so awesome that even Darth Vader uses him as his own personal Tauntaun when his TIE Fighter is in the workshop! (Man, that Vader is one badass son of a gun).



Yes, EVERY home should have a pet Balrog of its own!

Tuesday, 26 September 2006

Uncool Reading for the Cool Guy

The other day I heard the most brilliant comment ever.

"Why you read so much har? Reading is not cool ok? If chicks see you reading books, they won't wanna go out with you."

Suffice to say, the commenter was a guy. A really clueless guy.

Reading is not cool, eh? So what's your definition of 'cool'? Having a smoking stick hanging out of your mouth all the time? souping up your car with blue lights and blaring loud music? Starting a blog to become famous? Driving an SLK? Dressing up like a hip-hop star going yo yo yo all the time? Using lameass pickup lines? Going to clubs every night to look 'happening'?

So, it's 'cooler' to be intellectually-inept from NOT reading then? So you think it'll be easier to pull chicks when the most intellectual book you've read is The Hardy Boys because 'They were MEN, dude.' ? RIGHT...

Reading is cool, ok? It makes you look intellectual, and shows you actually have a brain beneath all that gelled dyed hair. Oklar, maybe in your eyes being seen with a book is not as cool as being seen in some Beemer or a SLK; but heck, I'd rather be able to strike up a conversation with a girl PROPERLY, rather than just sidling up to her and going, "Hey, How you doing? Wanna take a ride in my SLK?". How shallow did you think she is?

Of course, that does not mean EVERY book makes you look cool lar. For instance, here are some books that would definitely NOT make a guy look cool if caught reading them:
  • Any book with pictures of naked women on the cover: No it does not make you look cool neither does it make you seem as if you're a god in bed. It just makes you look like a perv.
  • Chic Lit and Romance: What, you trying to get in touch with your feminine side ar?
  • Any book by Dan Drown: EVERYBODY is bloody reading his stuff. So it's not cool anymore. He sucks anyway.
  • Leonardo Di Caprio: The Unofficial Autobiography: GAH!
  • Wayne Rooney: My Story So Far: Football + Books = cool, right? Wrong. especially when it comes to THIS piece of trash. If looking like a bandwagonist Manyoo fan who only supports the club because of Looney isn't bad enough, you'd also be killing your brain cells reading a meaningless autobiography of a shallow 20-year-old kid who probably didn't (or couldn't) write a single sentence to save his life.
  • Sex for Dummies - Nuff said'

Now, if you're not gonna read my Artemis Fowl, then return it or I'll put a spell on you.

Monday, 25 September 2006

Buffy Stakes Rocky's Boxer Shorts on Vader's Chopper

Sometimes the kind of junk that the world of toy collecting can come up with amazes me. Sure, I have a tendency to splash out cash on some completely stupid things as well (that tiny plastic replica of Princess Leis in a bikini is one of them. And it didn't even look remotely like Carrie Fisher in the first place), but at least I'm still sane enough to know that some of the 'movie merchandise' out there are just complete bollocks.

Take this, for example:



Wondering what that is? well, it's supposed to be a highly detailed replica of the vampire-slaying stake that Buffy used in Season 2. It's called 'Mr. Pointy', measures approximately 16 inches, comes painted and ready for display, and even has a a clear display case and plaque to display it with!

Yes, For a mere USD75, Buffy fans can now own a piece of Buffy Television history!!!!!1111
Still doesn't change the fact that the damn thing is just a bloody expensive polystone replica of a goddamn piece of wood.

You see, I may collect movie merchandise somewhat obsessively at times, but I do know how to draw the line. Well, most of the time, that is. Sometimes I still break down and spend cash on useless stuff like plastic One Rings and cheapo Burger King toys. But at least I'm not THAT into Star Wars stuff, or else I'd be bloody broke-r than I am right now.

You see, while I still tend to think Star Wars is pretty cool, I definitely draw the line at all the money-grabbing Star Wars merchandise that seem to flow endlessly from Lucas's money-milking franchise. These include a chokeload of Darth Vader stuff, ranging from multiple versions of Darth Vader cookie jars (which I have, I must shamefully admit) Darth Vader in various poses, Darth Vader lunchboxes, Mr Potatohead Darth Taters (which I also have. sigh), Darth Vader as a yellow M&M, PLUSH Darth Vaders, and the most 'brilliant' of them all, this monstrosity:



Darth Vader's Imperial CHOPPER? The Empire has TIE fighters, Star Destroyers, AT-AT's, AT-ST's and all sorts of cool vehicles; and Darth Vader, THE Darth Vader who can crush throats with a wave of his hands, has to resort to riding around in a bloody bike with WHEELS?

WHAT THE HELL were they thinking? "Bikes are cool + Vader is coolest villain in the universe = Let's put them both together to make the ultimate cool toy!" They'd be better off putting Luke Skywalker on a bike. Oh wait, they did that as well. GAH.

Oh, but wait, there is one more movie merchandise that really takes the cake when it comes to the absurdity of commercialised movie merchandise.

Behold, the most expensive pair of Boxer Shorts ever made for public purchase:




Rocky's boxer shorts, as worn by Sly Stallone! Only costs USD99!!! Woo hoo!

That's not all, apparently, the press release HERE says:

Get in the ring and give it your all with this Apollo Creed Boxing Shorts Replica! From the classic film, this wearable 1:1 prop replica...

Wow... WEARABLE samor. I'm sure EVERY home needs a pair of WEARABLE Rocky boxer shorts.

What next, a replica of Mark Wahlberg's prosthetic organ from Boogie Nights? A jar of blood collected from the Black Knight's chopped off arm in Monty Python and the Holy Grail? The jar of dirt from POTC 2? sheesh...

Saturday, 23 September 2006

Book Review: Forest Mage (Robin Hobb)

You know it's a weekend when I write book reviews. though I haven't done that for ages. Oh well, lalala.

Anyway, just finished Robin Hobb's Forest Mage. Mixed feelings about it. Read on...

-----------------------------------------------------------------



Title: Forest Mage (Book 2 of the Soldier Son trilogy)
Author: Robin Hobb

Synopsis:

SPOILERS IN SYNOPSIS
DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVE NOT READ SHAMAN'S CROSSING



The prestigious King's Cavalla of Gernia has been ravaged by the Speck plague. The deadly disease has decimated the ranks of both cadets and instructors, and the few survivors remain weak and frail. Many have been forced to relinquish their military ambitions and will return to their families to face lives of dependency and disappointment.

As the academy infirmary empties, cadet Nevare Burvelle also prepares to journey home. But far from being a broken man, Nevare has made an astonishingly robust recovery from the Speck plague. Yet back in the shelter of his family, Nevare finds his nights still haunted by visions of his Speck self betraying everything he holds dear in his waking life, and his days tormented by a rare side effect of the Speck plague. He also finds himself caught between the sensual, enchanting realm of the Specks and his own ancestry, the world he has always known.




What I Liked:
  • Much darker than the first.
  • I still like the way she unfolds the story bit by bit, letting you see more and more of the story with each page
  • The overall story is beginning to make a lot more sense now
  • Introduces a whole new element to the story
  • Makes you think about the way us 'civilised people' keep trying to convert indegenious people to our 'better ways'
  • The way it ends, the third book is going to be VERY interesting

What I Didn't Like:
  • Much more depressing than the first as well.
  • Hobb sometimes tends to over-describe things... very frustrating when you just wanna know what happens next
  • I still don't feel the same affinity I had for Nevare the same way I did for FitzChivalry
  • Does she REALLY need to make her characters suffer so much all the time?

Summary:

Somehow, I'm just not feeling as pumped up about the Soldier Son trilogy as I was about the Liveship Traders or the Tawny Man saga. I'm still wondering whether or not I like this series.

Dont' get me wrong, as far as fantasy series' go, this is still way better than some of the garbage out there. And Hobb's writing is still as engaging as ever.

However, as much as I like the way she writes, the story for this one is just not grabbing me as well as the first three series' did. Maybe it's because the lead character, Nevare is just no Fitz; maybe the story just isn't as deep or as complex as the others. Maybe I should just stop comparing this with the other books. Maybe I can enjoy it better that way.

Anyway, I said before that Hobb's books usually DO take their time to get into the real gist of the story. It's happening in this book as well, with the first book being an extended prolugue more than anything, and this second one merely bridging the gap between the first's somewhat shallow-seeming 'introduction period, and the third's hopefully more substantial handling of the overall plot. If the ending here is anything to go by, I'm hoping that the third book wil redeem the series.

It probably won't elevate it to FitzChivalry standards, but heck, it's still better than that Wheel of Time shit....

Friday, 22 September 2006

Plastic Peanut Butter Jelly Leias

I haven't been talking about my toys lately, because frankly, I have been too broke to buy any. I WAS rather tempted to buy some when I was in Bangkok, but the toys there cost at least 40% more than the ones here, so scratch THAT idea.

Anyway, I've been eyeing quite a few things that I REALLY wanna get, but are frankly, quite impossible to get here, unless I want to pay an arm, a leg and a ball for them.

One of them, is this little fella:


(picture from Michael Crawford's review of the Week)

Altogether now:

PEANUT BUTTER JELLY WITH A BASEBALL BAT!
PEANUT BUTTER JELLY WITH A BASEBALL BAT!
PEANUT BUTTER JELLY WITH A BASEBALL BAT!

Ahem. Anyway, Peanut-Butter-Jelly-Time Brian (from Family Guy, made by toy company Mezco) is almost impossible to find in KL, since Family Guy is not even bloody shown here. Sigh...

I've also been looking all over the place for Mattel's line of die-cast cars from er... Cars. So far I've managed to get Lightning McQueen, Mack, and all the two packs. But I don't have a Sally, Sarge, Doc Hudson and all the rest of the singles. :-(

And then there is this little baby, who IS in fact available here, but comes in at a whopping RM700++, which rules me out of th epicture. It IS probably the best likeness of the geek's all time favorite (sexual) fantasy evar though:



(That's not a toy BTW, it's supposed to be a 'statue'...)

Sigh... since I obviously can't afford that (and I wouldn't know where to put it anyway), I guess I'll have to settle for THIS instead:



Stupid cheap plastic.

Wednesday, 20 September 2006

From Flowers and Grasshoppers to Tanks and Guns

Life has a strange way of turning out sometimes, doesn't it?

If I had come back a mere one day later, you wouldn't be seeing pictures of grasshoppers and flowers on the blog, but of tanks and guns.

Funny thing is, the whole time I was there there were no signs at all. At least, not to MY uninformed eye lah (truth be told I was probably too preoccupied with er... 'work' to notice anything out of the ordinary anyway). So it was quite a shock to get an SMS last night, exactly 24 hours after I arrived home from Bangkok, saying "Tanks on streets in Bangkok. Watch CNN now. You missed the fun".

As far as near misses go, this one may not have been THAT near, in fact, it is probably nowhere near being 'near' at all; but heck, somehow I doubt being in the middle of a military coup would be any fun at all. Even if it IS a peaceful one.

But still, I couldn't help thinking this anyway, "Damn, I missed it by one day. If I were still there, what a damn good story/blog post it would have been, eh?

Tuesday, 19 September 2006

The Bangkok Album: Colors, Flowers, Food and Faces







Saturday, 16 September 2006

Airports remind me of Goodbyes



Airports always make me sad.
They remind me of hellos and goodbyes,
Of people leaving, and never coming home,
Of journeys made, and loneliness that follows
Of mistakes past, hurting and painful,
Of tears wept, happy or fearful,
Of memories, bitter or sweet,
Of decisions made, for better or worse,
Of friends lost, in hate or in love,
Of good intentions, vague and unfulfilled,
Of badly timed confessions, tactlessly delivered,
Of promises never kept and ever broken,
Of apologies that can never be forgiven,
Of regrets that will never be forgotten,
Of worries that will never be silenced,
Of what-might-have-beens that will never be answered,
Of wounds that don't seem to heal,
Of challenges that don't seem real,
Of goodbyes that are never said,
Of love that is never erased.

But most of all,
Airports make me sad,
Because it reminds me of saying goodbye.

Friday, 15 September 2006

Raining Gold and Hailing Stones



I don't usually go for plays. I'm not really a theatre kind of guy. Sure, I've been to a few, but I've never been a very artsy theatre kind of guy.

But anyway. I found myself going to Gold Rain and Hailstones last night. I'd initially planned not to go, but a combination of the Hantu Bola futsal getting cancelled and an unexpected availability of tickets saw me making the trip to KLPac to watch Jit Murad and Lin Jaafar.

Now, I didn't know what it was all about. But the article on Jit Murad in this month's Plan B intrigued me. It made me curious to see what he was like on stage. So when I got the ticket, I went.

Well, I have to say I was suitably impressed. Jit's a fascinating person to watch on stage. His expressions, timing, and voice is pretty damn good. Very cool to watch him acting. I'm putting him on my list of 'People I want to Interview'.

Anyway, remember what I said before about Sepet? Remember how after the movie you actually THOUGHT about what it means to be Malaysian? Remember how after the movie you would reminisce about all the things Malaysian that you used to do? (coincidentally, Sharifah Amani and family were watching the play yesterday as well. She's cute. :D).

Anyway, Gold Rain and Hailstones reminded me Sepet. The characters that Jit Murad and Lin Jaafar portrayed in the play were those we were all familiar with. The scenarios were also very Malaysian to the point where you'd have actually gone through it yourself.

Gold Rain and Hailstones made me think about what it's like being Malaysian (never mind it was also mostly about a certain race), with all the complex races and familiar characters, scenarios, memories all converging into one series of monologues (interesting monologues, but monologues no less).

The script itself was witty without being overly simple, cynical yet ironic. Even when they were monologuing to the audience, we listened to every word.

The two actors did a pretty damn good job of keeping us captivated throughout the two and a half hour play. and I can't really think of anything damningly bad to say about it (this coming from a guy who isn't very fond of watching theatre in the first place).

In fact, the only bad things I have to say about the whole thing was that uncle behind me who actually started SNORING when the final sequences of monologues came along, and the 'lao fong', soft choc chip cookies they gave out after the intermission (I still ate them all though).

So go watch the damn thing. Last show is on Sunday!

For more details go HERE


PS: Anyone know WHAT the title means????

Wednesday, 13 September 2006

Wishing for an Early Wintersmith

ARGH!!!! When is this book coming to Malaysia?!?!??! It's supposed to have been published already!!!!!




You know you can't wait for the new Terry Pratchett book to come out when...
  • You start dreaming about Nac Mac Feegle
  • You go to Kinokuniya every other day to check the 'new releases' shelves
  • You starve and reserve the last hundred bucks in your account just to buy the hardcover
  • You try to finish all the other books you're reading as soon as possible so that you'll be able to give all your attention to reading Wintersmith.
  • You freak out when your friend tells you it's already been released in the UK (WHY IS IT TAKING SO LONG TO GET HERE?!?!?!?!111)
  • You reread The Wee Free Men and A Hat Full of Sky again just to refresh your memory.
  • You contemplate buying the hrdcover versions of the two books so that when Wintersmith comes out and you buy it in hardcover, it will match the other two books.
  • You read the sneak preview on the back pages of Thud! over and over again to try and guess what Wintersmith's story will be about.
Yes, I'm obsessed about the book. So sue me.

Tuesday, 12 September 2006

The Mann does Miami

Okok, enough emo-emo. Lets talk about The Mann.

Michael Mann, that is.



I've never watched Heat, which is supposedly Mann's best work. I did watch Collateral though, and I thought it was awesome, Tom Cruise and all (in fact, I think Cruise was in his most watchable mode in that movie). Mann's movies damn stylo lar.

So, I was quite looking forward to Miami Vice. Never mind that it's based on an 80's TV series (No, I never watched the TV show either. I was too obsessed with Transformers at the time). Anyway, here's what I think about the movie:

Start of movie: Wow, cool...
First half hour: Fuiyor, damn stylo-milo. AWESOME.
Next half-hour: Gong Li. Drool drool drool.
45 minute mark: Ish, banyaknye yang kena cut.
One and a half hour mark: Eh, get on with it lar.
Two hour mark: Oi, cepat get to the final showdown already.
End of movie: Gah, I liked Collateral more.


Critics are saying Miami Vice is like a lesser version of Heat. I'm thinking I really need to go watch Heat.

But I don't think it has Gong Li.