Friday, 29 February 2008

From Darth Tater to Indiana Spud: Introducing Eyeris' Tater Family!

A varm velcome to all of you, especially if you managed to find yourself here after clicking on the links to this post that was posted on Pinkpau or Timothy's blogs (thanks for the plug, guys!).

Anyway, let me introduce you to the Tater family who were the stars of that particular Chipster post they linked to...

First up, Darth Tater, the most evil potatohead in the Potato Patch!



You've also met his evil minion, the Spudtrooper and his Tater Zapper!



Not forgetting of course, the horrendously out-of-shape superhero (though he DOES have a good figure... for a potato) Spider-Spud!



And the star/hero of the post.... OPTIMASH PRIME (who has also starred in several other 'shows' here on the blog, which you can read about HERE, HERE, HERE and HERE).



Yes, he's a real star, that Optimash.

Oh, and not forgetting the ONE Tater I have that I've yet to feature in the blog... ARTOO-POTATOO!!!




For now, Artoo is still stuck in his box, but if I think of a post where an potatohead droid might come in handy, he might just make his debut yet...

That's all the taters I have for now. and Yes, I have all these taters, but I don't have the ORIGINAL Mr. Potatohead. Yet.

And soon, I'm gonna be getting me grubby hands on THIS cool fella...



It's Indiana Spud and the Taters of the Lost Ark! And look, he even comes with his very own little Golden Potato Idol! Woohoo!

I have GOT to get me one of those...

Thursday, 28 February 2008

Four Years of Tagged Memories Gone Missing

Came in to work today, and my cubicle wall looked strangely empty. It took a while for it to register, then I realised that my ENTIRE collection of press/media passes which I had left hanging on the corner of the cubicle had gone missing.

That's about FOUR YEARS worth of media passes, all 40-50 of them, collected from cool events like movie premieres, junkets, concerts, parties and other events ok? Lots of sentimental value there!

There was the one I got from the Transformers and Spider-man junkets I went to, the one from the Grammys I got recently, and also a couple that were autographed by Jay Chou, Jacky Cheung and Stephen Chow, for gawds sake.

Funny thing is, anyone who's seen my desk at work will know that there are WAY more things that are worth stealing than that dusty pile of media tags. Which makes the whole thing so bizarre. Why would anyone want to steal a bunch of media passes, most of it with MY NAME ON IT, and not take any of the more valuable things I have on my desk? So bizarre. Maybe the thief wants to start a second hand lanyard business.

Sigh... four years plus worth of memories, gone missing. Gah. And I really liked that Grammys tag...

Wednesday, 27 February 2008

The New Terminator Hot Chick Beats the New K.I.T.T. Into Scrap Metal

So yeah, the writers strike is over. But it's still gonna be a long wait before your favorite shows like House MD, Heroes, and so on come out with their new seasons after their premature-ejaculation last seasons.

If you're a Lost fan, then good for you, because the show just started their new season a few weeks back. But for the rest of us who can't stand the confusion of Lost, here's a suggestion of a cool show that you simply HAVE to watch, especially if you're a fan of The Terminator.

Introducing... Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles!

Yes, it's a TV show based on the years between the awesome Terminator 2: Judgement Day and the rather lame-ass Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines; and as the title of the show suggests, it focuses on the adventures of post-T2 of Sarah Connor, as she goes into hiding to protect her son - John Connor, the future leader of the rebels fighting against Skynet.

So far, I've watched 4 episodes of the show, and it's rather promising, to tell the truth. the story gives a nice little twist to the continuity of the movies, and makes it even more intriguing to watch as you want to know how it will affect the overall plot given in the movies (and whether it will affect the making of any future Terminator movies as well). The writers not only have to make sure the plot makes sense, they also have to think about how it all ties in to what happens in T3.

Sure, there's no Arnie, and Sarah Connor may not be played by Linda Hamilton (it's played by Lena Hedley instead in the show), but she is still kick-ass and tough as she was in T2.

John is a bit of a wuss though. Frankly, if I knew that the hope of mankind rested on the shoulders of this wuss, I'd kill myself before I get a chance to see that future.

But wait, Sarah and John is not the biggest draw of the show. No, the biggest attraction of the show is THIS hot chick:




Summer Glau may have a strange sounding-name, but as Cameron Philips, a Terminator sent back fro mthe future to protect John, she's the hottest Terminator since Kristina Loken walked around in the nude and hijacked a car, and damn sight better looking than the LAST one Future John sent back to protect his past self. And she's not just a hot robot. Her presence and what she contributes to Sarah's fight against Skynet makes the plot even more intriguing.

That picture above not convincing enough for you? Here's more:



And if the Terminator ain't good enough for you, you could always go and check out the new Knight Rider 2008 pilot episode.

K.I.T.T. has gotten an upgrade from a Pontiac Trans Am to a power Ford Mustang, and it is KICKASS. And is that really Val Kilmer as K.I.T.T.'s voice?



The show DOES hold a little promise, but the new cast is a little too kayu for my liking, and the dialogue still recalls the cheesier shades of the OLD Knight Rider. And I couldn't help thinking how awesome it would be if K.I.T.T. suddenly transformed into Barricade...

Man, the new episodes of House and Heroes couldn't come sooner...

Don't know where to get the shows? Try HERE.

Tuesday, 26 February 2008

A Vantage Point of Eyeris' 1000th Post!!!!

It's taken almost four years, but this blog has finally reached the magic number of ONE THOUSAND POSTS!!!

YES! This is officially the 1000th post on Eye on Everything!

ONE THOUSAND!
1000!

Three Zeroes! (Count em!)
Woot Woot!
WHEE!
FIREWORKS!
MEXICAN WAVE!

So, what should I write about in this monumental post?
Er....
Um....
......
...

Oh screw it.
I've never been good at celebrations anyway.
Here's a Movie Not-Review instead.

------------------------------------------------------------------



Vantage Point.
Not a Review.
Not a normal movie.
Oh look, it's Ripley!
She's a news producer now?
Oh no! The President is shot!
Oh no! A Bomb!
Oh no! Chaos!
Eh? Rewind?



Vantage Point.
Not a Review.
Oh look, it's Dennis Quaid!
He looks old.
Oh no! The President is shot!
Oh no! A Bomb!
Oh no! Chaos!
Dennis goes into action!
Oh no, what did he see????
Eh? Rewind again?



Vantage Point.
Not a Review.
Oh look, it's some Spanish guy.
Apani, love story pulak.
Emo emo all.
Oh no! The President is shot!
Oh no! A Bomb!
Oh no! Chaos!
Oh no! A lot of running!
Uh Oh, here comes the rewind...



Vantage Point.
Not a Review.
Oh look, it's that Forest guy.
He won an Oscar last year.
Looking like some blur tourist now.
Oh no! Flashbacks of Cloverfield!
Oh no! The President is shot!
Oh no! A Bomb!
Oh no! Chaos!
What did he film?
Aiyor, REWIND AGAIN?????



Vantage Point.
Not a Review.
Don't blame me.
The whole film is like that.
Keep starting, rewinding.
Start, rewind.
Start, rewind.
Start, rewind.
It's like one short film,
But shown over and over again.
You see the same event,
Through different point of views.
It's frustrating at first,
But gets more interesting with each rewind.
Each rewind got cliffhanger.
And in the end damn exciting.
Awesome.
Nope, no more rewind.
Enough lar, haiyor.

Monday, 25 February 2008

The First Ever Live Coverage of the Oscars on EoE! (As seen on TV!)



For the first time in four years of existance, EoE now brings you the first ever 'LIVE' coverage of the ACEDEMY AWARDS (That's the Oscars lar, dummy)!!!

As seen on TV!!!

And for the benefit of all you poor sods who are stuck in the office and don't get to watch it! MUAHAHAHA!

And no, I'm not actually there. Duh.

IT'S DONE! Read on for the full blow-by-blow account of the 80th Oscars!

-------------------------------

1) Boring opening monologue/Democrat speech, Jon. Bring back Billy Crystal already. I miss his song and dance routines...

2) And the first award for Best Costume Design goes to....Elizabeth: The Golden Age.... zzzzzzzzzz

3) George Clooney. Again. Montage. Zzzzz. Oooh, so THAT's what Charlie Chaplin looks like!

4) Steve Carrell & Anne Hathaway! Best presenters so far. Second award goes to... Best Animated Feature RATATOUILLE!!!! YEEEEAH!!! YOU GO BRAD BIRD!!!

5) Next award, Best Makeup. La vie En Rose. Ho-hum.

6) Amy Adams. Singing. On Stage. The song is a lot less charming performed live...

7) THE ROCK presenting! Best Visual Effects!!! And the Winner is... NOT Transformers????!!???!?? GOLDEN COMPASS???!!??? BOO! BOO! HISS!

8) Cate Blanchett (she looks pregnant in that dress. Oh wait, she actually IS pregnant.) presents Best Art Direction.... won by.... SWEENEY TODD!

9) Best Supporting Actor montage. I don't know half the names mentioned there.

10) Jennifer Hudson. Most KAYU presenter I've ever seen. Best Supporting Actor Oscar goes to... Javier Bardem for No Country for Old Men! No surprises so far... except for Transformers losing. BAH. Still upset over that. (Coen vs Anderson showdown counter: NCFOM 1 - 0 There Will Be Blood.)

11) Montage tribute to binoculars and periscopes? HUH? Bad dreams? Ok, that was mildly funny, Jon. Not good enough, still.

12) Performance of song from August Rush called Raise It Up. what is this, the Grammys?

13) Owen Wilson is back! Presenting Best Live Action Short Film. Le Mozart des Pickpockets (The Mozart of Pickpockets) won. Never heard of it.

14) That bee from Bee Movie aka Jerry "Suanie hates me" Seinfeld presenting Best Animated Short Film. Can we get these small awards out of the way fast fast so we can get to the big ones PLEASE? Oh, Peter and The Wolf won, BTW. Like YOU cared. Yeah. If one of Pixar's films had been nominated, I'd have cared more too.

15) Best Supporting Actress. Tilda Swinton aka. The White Witch won for Michael Clayton! Damn I wanted Bob Dylan to win. Her hair looks really funky. And she HAD to mention George Clooney in Batman & Robin....

16) Geek Oscars were presented by Jessica Alba. It's a geek's wet dream I tell ya, to be presented an Oscar by Sue Storm herself.

17) Best Adapted Screenplay goes to the COENS for No Country For Old Men! (NCFOM 2 - 0 TWBB)

18) Video on how people vote for the Oscars. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. You didn't miss much.

19) Miley Cyrus presenting. She was at Grammys, now she's at the Oscars. She's EVERYWHERE!

20) That ensemble song from Enchanted. Nice song, so-so performance.

21) AND THE BABY GOES TO.... Jon's best joke of the evening. And it's not even THAT funny.

22) Seth Rogan and Jonah Hill as Judi Dench and Halle Berry! Funniest presenters of the night!

23) The Best Sound Editing award goes to.... Not Transformers again! The Academy must really hate Michael Bay. But then again it went to Bourne Ultimatum, so that's ok.

24) Still Hill/Berry and Rogen/Dench presenting. Still sound awards - this time Best Sound Mixing. The winner is.... STILL not Transformers! The Bourne Ultimatum wins again!

25) Best Actress Oscar coming up!

26) And the Best Actress goes to... Marion Cotillard in La Vie en Rose! (I liked Blanchett's expression when they showed her scene in Elizabeth)

27) Colin Farrell. I wish he'd REALLY fallen down. We'd be able to hear some bleeping action at the Oscars! Another song. Fallen Slowly, from Once. Nice song. Must go er... acquire.

28) Ever wanted to know all the 79 previous Best Movie winners? Look no further! HEEERE'S another boring montage!

29) Renee Zellweger present Best Editing Award. Nothing to shout about. Winner is.... THE BOURNE ULTIMATUM!

30) Nicole Kidman. Doesn't look too pregnant. WHAT IS WITH ALL THAT BLING???!!???? Some achievement award for a production designer. Ho Hum.

31) Jon Stewart is LAME.

32) PENELOPE CRUZ! HOT HOT HOT! But her presenting Best Foreign Language Film every year is getting a bit cliché. The winner is: Austria's The Counterfeiter.

33) Patrick Dempsey presents ANOTHER Enchanted song nominated for Best Song. Three out of five nominations. If they don't win the Oscar they can all go commit Hara-kiri.

34) John Travolta has weird flat hair. Presenting Best Song. Winner is.... NOT ENCHANTED!!!!! Glen Hansard wins for Falling Slowly, from Once!! Now I really MUST go and er... acquire the song. And more songs from The Frames (thanks MusicDungu!) (Rumours that the cast and composers of Enchanted were headed to the desert to commit hara-kiri were unfounded at press time).

35)Wow, they actually let the other composer of Falling Slowly Marketa Irglova out again to say her speech. So sweet. Score one for indie music!

36) There's something about Cameron. Haha. Yes yes. Presenting Cinnamontography er... Best Cinematography award. Winner is THERE WILLL BE BLOOD! (NCFOM 2-1 TWBB)

37) Hillary Swank pays tribute to ghosts of filmakers past. R.I.P. Kerr, Bergman, Ledger, and all of those who I may not have recognised.

38) The way the awards are going so far, I'm guessing the Coens and Anderson will be splitting Best Director and Best Picture awards.... But that's just MY opinion...

39) Amy Adams is CUTE! Presenting Best Original Score. No Jonny Greenwood. Boo! Winner is Atonement! Yay. not. Ratatouille lost again. Sigh.

40) Tom Hanks. Presenting the presenters of Best Documentary (Short Subject) - American soldiers in Baghdad. Pretentious American military-power ego-tripping stuff. BORING. Winner was Freeheld, in case you wanted to know.

41) Tom Hanks presented Best Documentary Feature too. Taxi to The Dark Side won. If only Sicko had won. Michael Moore's speeches are always entertaining.

42) Indiana Jones himself! Eh, where's the fedora? Presenting Best Original Screenplay... to Diablo Cody (wow, she's got a cool name), who wrote JUNO! YES! THEY WON ONE!

43) THREE AWARDS TO GO! THE BIG ONES ARE COMING!!! Best Actor is next! Go Daniel Day Lewis!

44) Helen Mirren is on to present Best Actor.... which goes to..... drum rollll..... DANIEL DAY-LEWISfor There Will Be Blood!!!!!!! Like duh, as if anyone else would have won. BTW, What the hell is wrong with his hair??? And I doubt Helen Mirren will ever hear the end of The Queen jokes. (NCFOM 2-2 TWBB)

45) Best Director award coming up!

46) Scorcese presents the Best Director(s) award.... Which goes to the Coen Brothers for No Country for Old Men!!! Ethan's speeches are the best! (I wanna Watch Harry Kissinger: Man on The Go. haha) (NCFOM 3-2 TWBB)

47) And the BEST MOTION PICTURE AWARD GOES TO..... NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN!!!



48) So, final tally is No Country for Old Men 4 - 2 There Will Be Blood. Not much of a showdown, I know. And imagine that, The Bourne Ultimatum got THREE (yes count em, THREE) Oscars, and that godamn sacrilegious (in Pullman terms, not religion-related) movie The Golden Compass also got one. Bah. Oh well, at least Ratatouille won Best Animated Feature.

49) And what a boring show. Boring performances, insipid host, boring montages, lame jokes, and so-so acceptance speeches. Only highlights were Jonah Hill and Seth Rogen's presentation, and Steve Carell. THAT'S how boring it was. Jon Stewart is a LOUSY HOST. Bring back Billy Crystal PLEEEEAAASEEE!!!!!

50) Anyway, that's it for the first ever LIVE coverage of the OSCARS (as seen on TV!) on Eye on Everything! Thanks to all two of you (including myself) who bothered to keep refreshing the page to check on the updates! Now, GET BACK TO WORK!

Sunday, 24 February 2008

It's Gonna Be Like Nightmare Before Christmas Meets Neil Gaiman

Here's the teaser trailer to another movie I'm DYING to watch...



Oooo, intriguing....



Aiyor so creepy... like baby's skin...



What're those skeletal hands????



What is it making???





What're the buttons for????



AIEEE! What's that doll????

It looks like this girl here!




NO!!!! GIRL!! Come back!!!!!!!! It's a TRAAAAAP!!!!!

Ahem.

So, what's the movie? Well, it's by the director of Nightmare Before Christmas, and based on a children's book by none other than the Rock Star of Fantasy himself: NEIL GAIMAN.

And it's called...



CORALINE!!!!!

I don't know about you, but I'm already lamenting the fact that this is one movie that is most definitely not coming here... Heck, most people here would probably be complaining that they spelled her name wrong, for gods' sake....

From the looks of this teaser trailer, it's shaping up to be a combination of Nightmare Before Christmas meets Neil Gaiman. And since the source material ain't half bad either, and the animation looks cool, it looks like a good watch, especially if it's in 3D.

A challenger to Wall.E perhaps?

Click HERE or on the last image to go watch the teaser trailer!


Related posts:
- Book Review: Coraline (Neil Gaiman)

Friday, 22 February 2008

Edison Has Quit. Can You People Get On With Your Lives Now?



Edison Chen apologises over sex photos

Actor and singer Edison Chen has apologised and promised to suspend his career in the aftermath of a sex photo scandal which has gripped China. - BBC Online

Can you believe this is the first time I've actually mentioned the whole Edison Chen scandal on this blog? Yeah, that's how much I thought about that so-called 'HOT TOPIC'.

Ya know, I actually feel sorry for Edison. I like him. Heck, I've actually met and interviewed him three times before, and he is actually a pretty decent dude - chatty, freindly, laid-back and quite articulate as well. Sure, he may come across as a little over-confident and too sure of himself sometimes, but then again, most celebrities I've met are that way anyway.

You see, Edison Chen did nothing wrong, IMHO. The only thing he was guilty of is having a healthy sex drive, and an unfortunate habit of keeping 'souvenirs' of his liasons with pretty girls. Heck, I'm sure it's quite a common er.. activity all over the world anyway.

"These photos were very private and have not been shown to people and were never intended to be shown to anyone," Edison said earlier today.

Look, it's not as if he took those pictures and then went around distributing them, or blackmailing the girls or somethign like that. He took those pictures so that in case he gets horny, he can jerk off to them once in a while.

So what, Hong Kong celebrities are not allowed to have sex? They're not allowed to have healthy sex lives?

This whole Edison Chen scandal thingy just underlines why I REALLY REALLLY HATE the Chinese entertainment industry. No, scratch that, I don't hate the INDUSTRY, I hater the bloody leeches, vampires who call themselves 'entertainment journalists' and are nothing more than scumbags who thrive on scandals and gossip.

So yeah, I feel sorry for Edison (and the girls of course). They are victims of a media and public so hungry to see celebrities fall (and fall HARD) that they would ignore the fact that celebrities, like us all, are people as well.

"I have failed as a role model. However, I wish that this matter will teach everyone a lesson," he added.

No dude, the only thing you've failed at is keeping your sexual activites a secret. And you did good, coming back to Hong Kong and admitting your 'mistakes' and apologising to the families of the girls. THAT makes you a bigger man than anyone else involved in this shitty scandal.

As for the Hong Kong entertainment industry, screw them, dude. There's always Hollywood. Look what having a sex scandal did for a wannabe like Paris Hilton, eh?


PS: Those of you who came here hoping for THOSE pictures... FUCK THE HELL OFF.

Goldfrapp Breathes the Most Gorgeous Pop Song Of the Year



My latest obsession: Goldfrapp.

Didn't used to like them before, but yesterday an odd thing happened. I actually listened to ONE SONG non-stop, on loop, for almsot an entire day.

I repeated Goldfrapp's A&E for god knows how long - that same song over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again.

And I'm still listening to it even right now as I type this.




I'd never really gotten into Golfrapp before, because I'm not THAT fond of electronica, and their last album - Supernature - was mostly dance-oriented. But A&E is such a perfect pop song for me that I'm tempted to go out and buy the Seventh Tree album just based on that one song.

For me, it's the best song I've heard so far this year. The tendering intro, the soaring instrumentals, the uplifting refrain and chorus, and of course, that gorgeous, gorgeous voice of Alison Goldfrapp just BREATHING through the song... it's the sexiest vocals I've heard in a song since like... FOREVER.

Go download it here. You won't regret it.

Thursday, 21 February 2008

There Will Not Be Much Blood But a Lot of Daniel Day-Lewis



There Will Be Blood.
There will Not be a Review.
There will not be any gunfights,
There will not be any swordfights.
There will not be any decapitations.
There will not be any limbs getting chopped off.
There will not be that much blood in the first place.
There will not be any dialogue for the first 20 minutes.
There will only be Daniel Day-Lewis.



There WILL be A LOT of Daniel Day-Lewis.
There will be Daniel Day-Lewis mining,
There will be Daniel Day-Lewis talking,
There will be Daniel Day-Lewis covered in oil,
There will be Daniel Day-Lewis looking scruffy,
There will be Daniel Day-Lewis in a mine-hole,
There will be Daniel Day-Lewis in almost every scene.
There will hardly be any scene WITHOUT Daniel Day-Lewis.
There will be an Oscar for Daniel Day-Lewis.



There will be more oil than blood.
There will be a lot of talking and preaching.
There will be religion.
There will be sounds and no sounds.
There will be an eerie Jonny Greenwood soundtrack,
There will be creepy religious fanatism,
There will be enlightening moments.



There will be yawning
There will be a lot of fidgeting too.
There will be a lot of annoyed Ah Bengs in the cinema.
There will be a lot of question marks,
There will be a lot of people wondering what it was about.
There will be a lot of complaining about the slow pace
There will be a lot of fawning over it by critics,
There will be a lot of Oscars for it.
But there will not be a repeat viewing for me.



Previous Movie Not-Reviews in 2008:
- ET Meets Stephen in CJ7
- Rambo: Lots and Lots of Blood Part IV
- It's Huge! It's Alive! It Destroys Stuff! It's the Cloverfield Monster!!!

Cannibalistic Potatoes Sleep Better With Chipster!





























DISCLAIMER: There are no actual pictures of Eyeris sleeping with Chipster packs because Eyeris is an anonymous blogger, and so he is represented by Optimash Prime instead. However, if this post wins a place to the Nuffnang pajama party, Eyeris shall go in Optimash Prime's place because Optimash Prime can't drive. He's a potato.