Wednesday, 30 April 2008

Viva Le Coldplay or Free Song For All Their Fans

Want a free, new Coldplay song? Well, go to Coldplay's website (www.coldplay.com) right now, and this is what you'll see:



Click on the 'Song' button, register your email and country code, and you can download a NEW Coldplay song called VIOLET HILL, from their upcoming new album 'Viva la Vida or Death and All His Friends'. No, I have no idea why they named it that either.

Anyway, there's more. Click on 'Artwork', and this is what you'll get.



Man, that is one sucky album cover.

But at least the song Violet Hill is pretty good. At first listen, it's nothing like anything in the past two albums, and is actually pretty catchy too. After a couple more listens you do catch the distinct Coldplay trademarks in the song. And based on that song, I think my enthusiasm for the new album just went up a notch. Or maybe half a notch.

Wow, first Mrs. Chris Martin turns in a decently hot performance in Iron Man, now Chris Martin himself actually puts some decent vocals in a decent song without overloading it with his usual falsettos... What next, Apple to come up with her own album of kiddy songs?


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Eyeris' Ongoing List of Songs You Have To Listen To in 2008

(** denotes newly added songs)

  1. A&E (Goldfrapp)
  2. Mercy (Duffy)
  3. ** We Hate The Kids (The Indelicates)
  4. The Last Significant Statement To Be Made In Rock 'n Roll (The Indelicates)
  5. Whose Authority (Nada Surf)
  6. ** Lonely Buoy (Joe Lean & The Jing Jang Jong)
  7. Oxford Comma (Vampire Weekend)
  8. ** Xavia (The Submarines)
  9. Chasing Pavements (Adele)
  10. Wrestlers (Hot Chip)
  11. ** Life Being What It Is (Kaki King)
  12. ** Of Monsters and Heroes and Men (James)
  13. ** New Art For The People (The Indelicates)
  14. Too Drunk To Dream (Magnetic Fields)
  15. Salute Your Solution (The Raconteurs)
  16. ** Violet Hill (Coldplay)
  17. Going On (Gnarls Barkley)

Tuesday, 29 April 2008

Iron Man, Iron Man, Does whatever scrap metal can...



Iron Man.
Not a review.
KICKASS.
AWESOME.
AWESOME AWESOME.
So awesome that I'm going to watch it AGAIN tonight!
So awesome that you don't even mind Gwyneth Paltrow!
(In fact she's actually quite hot here.)
So awesome that I can't wait to see Robert Downey Jr. again!
(as a black dude!)
So awesome that this not-review will continue,
With a song and dance routine instead!
Sung to the Spiderman theme, aka the Spider-pig song!



Iron Man, Iron Man,
Isn't just a big tin can,
When it's dark, he works best,
Cos' there's a flashlight in his chest,
Look out! Here comes the Iron Man!



Tony Stark, is a rich dude,
His misai is cooler than Fu Manchu's
When he's caught, he kept his cool,
He made a suit with some lousy tools,
Look out, there goes the Iron Man!



Iron Man, Iron Man,
He never ever could get a tan,
In the desert, though it was hot,
He kicked ass while dressed like a pot,
Look out! Here comes the Iron Man!



Iron Monger, he's the one,
Who threw cars at him just for fun,
When they fought, it was cool,
Like two refrigerators in a duel,
Look out! Here comes the Iron Man!



Iron Man, Iron Man,
Does whatever scrap metal can,
Bring him to, a scrapyard, quick,
He's worth more, than a manhole lid,
Look out! here comes the Iron Man!



Is he strong? I can't see,
He's got more steel than Bumblebee,
You can sell him, for some cash,
If you do, Sabah will crash,
Hey there! There goes the Iron Man..
Here comes the IRON MAAAAAAN!!!!

Why Do You People Bother Watching That Drivel?

There are two shows I swore I would never blog about in this period of time when blog obsession for these two shows are at a frenzied height currently:

1) That damn all-singing, all-dancing, reality show where fame-chasing wannabes go to become potential Grammy-winning superstars or potential washouts and are judged by three judges, one of which is the most annoying, weak, fake, and lame-ass 'judge' ever (judging by her OWN 'comeback' performance in one episode I was unfortunate enough to catch in the office, I say people should be given an option to vote HER off instead); and where the winner is determined not by how well he or she sings but how cute their smile is (see how a certain contestant in the current season steamrolled half the competition based on his smile alone), how big their boobs are (whether male or female, see season 2, buek!), as voted for by millions of suckers who think nothing of spending their parent's money on calling and texting in their votes by the dozens.

2) That silly pagaent-cum-popularity-contest-cum-crap-ass-production where 12 girls were chosen to kononnya represent the pinnacle of beauty of Malaysian women and to parade around and take amateurish pictures while sporting lousy hairstyles and wearing strange godawful-ly ugly outfits disguised as 'fashion creations', or almost nothing at all (which I must admit was the one plus point of the whole damn thing); when most of them are not even worthy of appearing in my NIGHTMARES, let alone the collective dreams of Malaysian men (unless they're nightmares, hey, would you REALLY want to go out with a GIRL, not a woman, mind; who runs to daddy everytime she needs something?). There are a lot of hotter girls out there, dumbasses, stop obsessing over the vainpots in the show and go after the REAL hot Malaysian women out there who are too smart to go join something as silly, pointless and degrading as that dumbass show.

Yes I know I said I wouldn't blog about the shows, but hey, I reckon that if I don't mention the shows' names, it doens't count, right? Heh.

Bah, go waste your time watching those shows all you want. I'm going to watch Iron Man twice in one day! For free! Woohoo!

Monday, 28 April 2008

Starting The Day With a Some Panic and Bones

8:00am - Wake up. Snoozzzzzzzzeeeeeeeee

8:35am - Wake up again. Drag myself out of bed, brush teeth.

8:45am - Take out mobile phone and place it in most strategic location in house (Read: The only place where I can actually GET bloody Maxis reception in my house. And even then, only two bars.

8:55am - Still waiting for the call.

9:00am - Ring ring! "Hello, is this eyeris? We're patching you through to the conference call"

9:10am - "Hi everyone, we've got Emily on the line." "Hi Emily!"

9:15am - Toot Toot Tooooooooooooooot.... ARGH! It's my turn! I haven't asked asked my question yet!!!!! Don't get disconnected.... NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

9:16am - Runs around panicking.

9:17am - Runs into car outside, gets in the back seat and wait for then to call back. Four Bars should be ok right?

9: 20am - Sitting inside back seat of car in shorts and t-shirt. Talking to Emily Deschanel aka. Temperence "Bones" Brennan.

What a way to start a Monday morning, huh?

Sunday, 27 April 2008

Book Review: Persepolis (Marjane Satrapi)

The Hopefully-Weekly-Book Review (aka. The Almost-Monthly-Book-Review) is back this week, and this time, it's a really good book I'm reviewing. No really, don't watch the movie for Persepolis yet - the book is the original, and you HAVE to read it!

------------------------------------------



Title: Persepolis
Author/illustrator: Marjane Satrapi


Synopsis (from Amazon.com)
The story of Satrapi's unforgettable childhood and coming of age within a large and loving family in Tehran during the Islamic Revolution; of the contradictions between private life and public life in a country plagued by political upheaval; of her high school years in Vienna facing the trails of adolescence far from her family; of her homecoming--both sweet and terrible; and, finally, of her self-imposed exile from her beloved homeland. It is the chronicle of a girlhood and adolescence at once outrageous and familiar, a young life entwined with the history of her country yet filled with the universal trials and joys of growing up.


What I Liked:
  • Awesome, awesome book. Best I've read in ages.
  • It's a comic, but not really a comic!
  • It's absorbing, and very entertaining at the same time.
  • It's funny! Though in a rather sad-funny kinda way at times.
  • The story's pretty damn good too.
  • She's very good at putting things in perspective.
  • She's also suitably candid when dealing with the heavy issues
  • I love how candid and blunt she can be with her words and drawings
  • The drawings are cute! and yet very tragic at the same time.
  • You actually learn a lot about what happened (and happens in Iran, and some world history too.


What I Didn't Like:
  • The grown-up Marjane in the second book, The Story of a Return; was not as entertaining as the child Marjane.
  • I couldn't tell the some of the characters apart at times...

Summary:
I dare anyone to read this book and then tell me that graphic novels are for kids, or are just about superheroes, or cannot be considered 'literature'.

This is a perfect example of a REAL novel, a REAL novel put into pictures, and with REAL serious issues put in the most whimsical, yet engaging way possible.

It's a comic, but sometimes you don't really feel it's a 'comic' at times, more like a proper novel, told in the most simplistic, yet thorough and visual way possible. It also helps that Marjane's life is one of the most incredibly warped journeys I've ever read, but it was still engaging to read about how she and her family had to cope with the regimes in Iran, the war and how she managed to cope in liberal Europe on her own, then come home to the completely different culture of Iran again.

It hits hard at issues, but not hard enough to make you wanna take up picket signs or press nuclear weapons launch buttons. And when it's funny, its really funny. And it doesn't feel boring one bit (except a few parts when she's in in Europe).

The first part of the book (the version I read combines Persepolis: The Story of a Childhood & its sequel Persepolis 2: The Story of a Return in one book) is the best one, because we see Marjane actually growing up in Iran, with war and over-zealousness regimes all around her, and how her thoughts and behaviors are shaped by everything. It also helps that little Marjane is damn cute.

The second book, however, is a little more serious. It's a lot more adult-Marjane oriented, obviously because Marjane is grown up and thinks about things more deeply than a Kid Marjane would. That doesn't mean its any less entertaining or good to read though - it's stil good, but a little more serious than the first one, that's all.

Anyway, no need to say anymore - Buy, beg or steal, you HAVE to read this book. So go get it!!!

Friday, 25 April 2008

How to Become a Director of a Lord Of the Rings Movie

1) Must be willing to live in New Zealand for four years.

2) Must use special effects by WETA and not that Lucasthingy.

3) Must have a good grasp of making movies with fantasy elements:




4) Must be able to come up with cool designs for fantasy creatures like these:




4) Must look like a Hobbit:




In case you haven't guessed already, yup, it's FINALLY CONFIRMED:

Guillermo Del Toro will direct THE HOBBIT!

WOOHOO!

Rejoice! The Summer Blockbuster Season Is Upon Us!

Seeing the Iron Man cover on the paper today made me realise one thing:

WOOHOO! THE SUMMER BLOCKBUSTER SEASON IS HERE! HOORAY FOR SUPERHEROES, ADVENTURERS AND CHEESY CGI EFFECTS! WOOHOO!!!!

Ahem.

So, as a little service to all 30 of you out there who actually come here to read SOMETHING, here's a little round-up of what to expect this couple of months. And trust me, it's gonna be one hell of a Summer Blockbuster season this year...

(BTw, all release dates are US dates unless stated otherwise...)

------------------------------------------------------


Iron Man
(April 30, Malaysian release date)

My colleague, who has already seen the movie, lucky bastard, says that this movie exceeded all his expectations and blew his apprehensions away. And Judging from the kickass trailers that have already been released, I'd say Marvel has another hit franchise on their hands.


------------------------------------------------------


Speed Racer
(May 9, Malaysian release date)

My expectations for this movie are kinda low, especially since the trailers have a rather er... Technicoloured cheesy-looking feel to them. Somehow I doubt it's gonna reach the heights that The Matrix did, but hey, I'll watch it just because it's the Warchowskis.



------------------------------------------------------


The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian
(May 15, Malaysian release date)

Say what you want about the first movie,I kinda liked it, and it's still miles ahead of many other adaptations of children's fantasy books. Besides, Prince Caspian is my favorite of all the Narnia books, and I can't wait to see how Reepicheep is like!


------------------------------------------------------


Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of The Crystal Skull
(May 22, Malaysian release date)

Don't know who Indiana Jones is? Hop into that Delorean, go back to the 80's and check out the coolest adventurer in movie history! The Fedora is back! Woohoo!



------------------------------------------------------


Kungfu Panda
(June 6)

To tell the truth I'm not THAT excited over this movie, not with Wall-E coming up so soon after it. And the LAST TIME Angelina Jolie and Jack Black were in a cartoon together, it was for that awful Shark Tale. But still, it's a cartoon, and I'm a real sucker for cartoons....



------------------------------------------------------


The Incredible Hulk
(June 13)

Forget that soppy Ang Lee Hulk soap opera a few years back. This is shaping up to be the real green deal, and considering how hard it is to get Edward Norton to actually WANT to do a movie (let alone a superhero one), this should be pretty interesting...



------------------------------------------------------


The Happening
(June 13)

It's M. Night Shyamalan. And I'm a real sucker for M. Night Shyamalan. Hey, I LIKED all those movies he made after The Sixth Sense, ok?




------------------------------------------------------


Wall-E
(June 26)

What can I say about this movie that I haven't gushed about already? This is the movie I'm REALLY waiting for, and it's not just because I'm a Pixar freak. Heck, even its TRAILER was better than any other movie so far this year...



------------------------------------------------------


Wanted
(June 26)

Comic adaptation. Angelina Jolie. James McAvoy. That dude who did Night Watch and Day Watch. Do I really need to say more?





------------------------------------------------------


Hancock
(July 2)

Will Smith in a superhero movie that is not based on a comic book. Doesn't sound too bad a premise, except that I really hope we don't get another nauseating overload of Smith-ness like we did in I Am Legend.



------------------------------------------------------


Hellboy II: The Golden Army
(July 11)

Hellboy is back! Woohoo! And this time, Del Toro is bringing out an entire ARMY of fantasy creatures! Now lets just hope they don't decide to call it Super Sapiens II this time around...




------------------------------------------------------


The Dark Knight
(July 18)

The one everyone seems to be waiting for. Heath Legder's final bow - potentially the greatest Joker ever. BATMAN. Don't bluff lar, you KNOW YOU WANNA SEE THIS.





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The X-Files: I Want To Believe
(July 25)

Hey, it's the X-FILES. It's Mulder and Scully. And it's not gonna have all that stupid conspiracies that killed the TV show in the first place. So Of COURSE I want to believe it'll be great!

Wednesday, 23 April 2008

Swifty and Suanie Should Get Golden Chicken Rice Awards



Chicken Rice Mystery.
Not a Review.
BMW Shorties.
A film award for shorties only.
Donno how Swifty got in.
He not short also.
Anyway, go watch it here yo,
And then vote for him HERE!!
Isn't that what blogging is for?
So you can get lots of fans and friends,
And then get them to help you win online popularity contests?
Ahahaha.


Some shots of water. Just because you know, the theme is H2O.

Eh I thought the theme is H2O?
Why chicken rice wan?
Talking about the chicken rice soup is it?
Or maybe the artsy shots of water dripping,
And the shots of water in the lake.
So random wtf hahaha.
AAANYYWAY...
Chicken rice very the funny.
Fried porridge ahahaha.
Sashimi ahahaha.
I hungry now.
I want eat chicken rice.
Oh wait I just had chicken rice this morning.



The cast not bad too.
The kid pandai emo.
Can pose like karaoke MV also.
And the supporting cast also funny.
Hey, isn't that Lai Meng?
Not Leon "Tone-deaf" Lai dumbass,
Lai Meng the Malaysian actress.
Got James Lee also.
Wah Swifty got friends in high places.
Why no Dawn Yang?
If she was in,
I could have given the show a Cleavage Rating.


Wah budak ni, kecik-kecik dah pandai emo...

Hey look, it's Suanie!
Woot woot!
She deserves the award for Best Actress,
Best action sequence for the lollipop fight,
And Best Make-up just for the scary apparition that is Suanie-in-Makeup.
Ahahahaha.
Wonder if she steals Ryan's lollipop also.
SUANIE FOR BEST ACTRESS OSCAR!
SWIFTY FOR BEST DIRECTOR OSCAR!
WOOT!
GO VOTE NOW!

The Most Addictively Indelicate Statement to Be Made in Rock 'N Roll



I don't listen to mainstream music much. And I'm glad, because nothing I've heard in mainstream music this year so far has come even as close to being as addictively catchy as the songs in The Indelicates' American Demo album are.

Ok, their music isn't exactly high art even though they mention the word 'Art' in their lyrics a lot. But boy is it addictive. I love the the combination of the male and female vocals, their catchy tunes, the brilliantly simple yet articulate lyrics, and the fact that they take on the highly philosophical question of what would have happened er.. If Jeff Buckley Had Lived:

If Jeff Buckley had lived, and his voice still was heard
On the weak second album, and difficult third
Then the critics, who broke him, he couldn't forgive
Would grow old and forget him, if Jeff Buckley had lived

Ngehehehehe. Mrs. Jeff Buckley, what say you to that? :D

My favorite songs on this album are The Last Significant Statement to Be Made in Rock 'n Roll, New Art For The People, and We Hate The Kids (which kinda sounds like 4 Non Blondes' What's Up and Bon Jovi's Livin' on a Prayer at first), though the rest are pretty cool songs as well.

BTW, a sample of their songs can be found HERE, as well as a pretty good description of the band (better than mine, at least. heh). Go check it out - this is definitely an album I'm gonna buy. If I can even find it in Malaysia. :S Oh well, Amazon it is then...


--------------------------------------------

BTW, I've decided that from this post onwards I'm going to add a little list at the end of ALL my music posts listing the best songs I've heard so far in the year. And I'm calling it... The "If You Only Listen to 10 Songs in 2008, Listen To..." list; and it'll be updated in every Music-related post I put up here. It's like my own little Music Chart, with my favorites right on top; but the difference is if I haven't heard anything worth putting on the list since the last music post, then the songs will remain the same lor...

Anyway... here goes!

If You Only Listen to 10 Songs in 2008, Listen To...

  1. A&E (Goldfrapp)
  2. Mercy (Duffy)
  3. The Last Significant Statement To Be Made In Rock 'n Roll (The Indelicates)
  4. Whose Authority (Nada Surf)
  5. Oxford Comma (Vampire Weekend)
  6. Chasing Pavements (Adele)
  7. Wrestlers (Hot Chip)
  8. Too Drunk To Dream (Magnetic Fields)
  9. Salute Your Solution (The Raconteurs)
  10. Going On (Gnarls Barkley)

Worse. Trip. Ever.

  • Two hour waits for vans that never show up.
  • Three hour assignments under sweltering heat inside sauna-like film studios/warehouses.
  • Dumbass Singaporean reporters asking stupid questions like "Did it hurt when he hit you on the head?"
  • Tomyam that sucked even more than Maggi. "Best Thai Food" my ass.
  • First Hotel Bangkok, worse hotel ever.
  • Bed Bugs. Bah. Still itches.
  • Stupid taxi driver who stops halfway to buy Shell Ferrari cars while ferrying a whole van-load of people rushing to catch a plane.

Oh well, at least I didn't spend a single sen, and the beer was free.

Sunday, 20 April 2008

Celebrate World Book Day With More Cheap Books!

I'm gonna be away in the land of tomyam for a couple of days... so unless I miraculously get some form of wifi connection while I'm there, I doubt I'll be updating... but anyway, here's a little announcement from all-time favorite EoE bookshop BookXcess, who're celebrating WORLD BOOK DAY (the worldwide one this time, not the UK & Ireland one I mentioned last time):

And of course, there's gonna be DISCOUNTS! WHEE!

Here's the flyer...



That's all for now! Time to go pack for the trip! Whee!

Friday, 18 April 2008

Hollywood Should Be Forbidden From Making Kungfu Movies Forever



The Forbidden Kingdom.
功夫之王.
Not a Review.
Jet Li and Jackie Chan.
Any movie with those two should rock awesome balls right?
Wrong.
I wanted to stab myself halfway through the movie.
This is a waste of two perfectly awesome kungfu legends.
They better be getting paid bloody a lot for it.
No wonder Jackie once said no Chinese director would touch the film.
But then, what's Jackie, Jet and Yuen Wo Ping doing in it then?
Stop mucking about in Hollywood, you schmucks,
Come back to Asia and make some REAL movies godammit.



It's not ALL bad though.
Jackie and Jet are still great to watch.
But only when they are not talking.
When they are fighting, it's awesome.
Especially when they are fighting EACH OTHER.
In fact, it was awesome when NO ONE was talking at all,
And when people were engaged in SOME FORM of fighting,
And not TRYING to act.



The chick is cute though, at least.
Sorry, the CHICKS.
And one got cleavage samore.
Cleavage Rating: 7
(Only because Chinese actresses showing cleavage are so rare)
(Unless your name is Gong Li of course)
But why do both of them look so much like Zhang Zi Yi?
No budget to get the real deal,
So had to settle for TWO actresses who LOOKED like her is it?



Oh and in case you were wondering,
Yes the movie is in English, sort of.
Got some Chinese, but sporadic.
Which is hilarious.
Sekejap Chinese, Sekejap English,
Even Emperors of the Sky speak English!
So does the Monkey King!
And what's with the chick?
Always referring to herself in the third person?
Who does she think she is, Kanye?



Tribute to martial arts my arse lar.
More like rip-off of every Chinese wuxia cliche ever done.
Chase in Bamboo forest? Check.
Fight in a forest of plum blossoms? Check.
Flying sharp objects in slow-mo? Check.
Fight in traditional Chinese inn? Check.
Skimpily dressed chicks dancing in front of drums? Check.
Clueless disciple doing the 'Jackie Chan Stance"? Check.
Said disciple training in a waterfall? Check.



Hot chick who looks like Zhang Ziyi out for vengence? Check.
Said hot chick playing traditional Chinese instrument? Check.
Evil hot chick with white hair? Check.
Beggar using the Drunken Fist? Check.
Bald-headed monk riding a white horse? Check.
Old wise man telling stories of old Chinese legends? Check.
Wannabe Karate Kid beating the big bullies? Check.
Eh wait, Was Karate Kid a Chinese wuxia show?
Didn't think so.



Oh wait, he didn't just rip off wuxia movies.
He also made a Chinese Lord of the Rings!
See, got waterfalls, mountains, desert dunes,
There's something that looks like Rivendell,
There's an 'Evil Galadriel' moment,
There's a Frodo-falling-down-in-snow moment,
There's a Army of Mordor Marching out of Minas Morgul moment,
There's even a Mount Doom somewhere in there.
All that's missing is some Hobbit-on-Hobbit action.
Or Wizard-on-Hobbit action.
Whatever.



Note to Hollywood,
Stop casting Mat Sallehs in kungfu movies,
Especially those set in CHINA.
Because Mat Sallehs SUCK at kungfu.
Look at Neo.
He claimed he knew kungfu,
But he fought like a wooden plank with flaying legs.
No lemme rephrase.
Hollywood,
Leave the wuxia movies to the Chinese PLEASE.
Oh, and Rob Minkoff should be arrested and put on trial.
The crime?
The Chronic Waste of Two Awesome Kungfu Legends in a Single movie.
The sentence?
To be consigned to making straight-to-DVD sequels of Disney Cartoons.
Like. FOREVER.
Kthxbai.


Go fu your kung far far, angmoh.

Thursday, 17 April 2008

The Post with No Point

I have a whole new Movie Not Review nicely written and ready to be published.... but I can't because everyone who saw the movie kena embargo and kenot publish anything about it until tomorrow 8am. Sien. And it was a brilliant Non-review too. Oh well.

If there's one thing I've noticed about my life these days, it's that I've been spending way too much time in shopping malls. And before you ask, NO I am not in Singapore. I mean I really do spend damn a lot of time in shopping malls. If I wanna work somewhere outside home and the office, I go to a shopping mall. If I wanna watch a movie, I go to a shopping mall. All the places I hang out in seem to be in a shopping mall. I even schedule my interviews in cafes in shopping malls sometimes. Heck, I even have (ok, officialy HAD as of two minutes ago) a playlist on my iPod titled "Shopping Mall".

Anyway, the point of me point this out is that I was sitting in this shopping mall right now typing furiously and trying to meet my deadlines, when I had an epiphany: I spend way too much time in shopping malls. Which is to say there really is no point to this point to this post except to allow me to type out some thoughts that were running through my head so that they have somewhere to reside other than inside my head and so I'm freewriting them down here because I don't want to keep thinking about them while I'm working. So there.

But it's also because I already had this great idea for a Movie Not-Review about a certain movie with two J's in them but I can't post about it until tomorrow morning 8am. Bah. So here I was with nothing to post about except this pile of gibberish freewriting that makes you as sucker for reading it because I have said nothing whatsoever in here besides what I was thinking about and what I feel like right now, and also I needed somewhere to let those rambling thoughts reside while I sort them out.

Wait, isn't that what blogs used to be for? For speaking your mind? To write things down? You mean blogs back then had no pictures? You mean there were no ads in blogs before this? You mean the point of blogging is not to be famous? You mean 'blogger' is not a real title?

OMG what zaman I come from har? Suan? Jayelle? Anyone?

And no, that last bit was still not the point of this post.

Bah humbug.

Now shoo I've got those wandering thoughts out of my head and I must work now.

Tuesday, 15 April 2008

10 Reasons Why Eyeris is Better Than Kennysia

Fireangel: Oi go back and update your blog, I'm bored and need something to read.
Eyeris: But I don't know what to update about...
Fireangel: I don't care, make something up like "10 reasons why your blog is better than Kenny Sia's"....

Well, ask and yer shall receive, I always say. Hehehe. And remember, in case I get any Kenny-loving flamers for this post, IT WAS ALL FA'S IDEA, OK?

:D :D :D

----------------------------------------------------

10 Reasons Why Eyeris is Better Than Kennysia.com

  1. I don't have any reasons for people to come up with posts that have ten reasons on why they are better than I am.

  2. I'm always better looking than he is because you never know what I look like. Ahahaha.

  3. I don't have coconuts for balls. As FA puts it so eloquently, "Who wants to go out with someone with coconuts for balls anyway?" Ahahaha. Which brings me to...

  4. I have regular lunch dates with Fireangel! Woot! Who wants to touch me??!?!???

  5. I don't have little children reading my blog so I can blog all I want about GROWN-UP stuff like coffee, alcohol, hot chicks, and toys... er.... ok scratch that last one. Besides,I'm the only blogger around who can NOT review a movie and still be called a movie reviewer. Ahaha.

  6. I update faster and a lot more often than he does, so my readers have new things to read everyday! (well, ALMOST everyday anyway. And this is probably because I spend a lot more time online surfing po... er.. DOING RESEARCH than he does, but I'm still better!)

  7. I don't have to resort to covert 'April's Fool!' tactics when I want to taruh my readers (probably also because I don't have that many readers in the first place but what the hey...)

  8. I don't have dumbass readers who spam my comment box with "FIRST!" "SECOND!" "OMG I THOUGHT I WAS FIRST BUT I'M THIRD!" (though I'm usually happy to get ANY SORT of comments at all in the first place... hehe)

  9. I have stunt doubles like Darth Tater and Optimash Prime to do the dirty work for me, so I don't have to torture my readers with disturbing pictures of my beer belly or hairy legs.

  10. I was the one to who got him featured in a newspaper for the first time EVER!! Ahahaha. Fooyor I so proud. Who wants to touch me (again)? :D :D :D


Well, that's all I can think of. Now it's YOUR TURN! Tell me, why is Eyeris beter than Kennysia? And be nice, ok? Ahahaha.

Monday, 14 April 2008

The Kilkenny Bebola Terapung Ajaib

I was enjoying a nice cold can of Kilkenny with Su Yin the other day, and we discovered something strange. After finishing the cans, there was something knocking about inside them.

At first, we thought it was a a piece of ice (we'd left the cans in the freezer and thought a bit of it had frozen), but upon closer inspection, we realised it was something else altogether.

So, being the insatiably curious buggers we were, we decided to break open the can and take a look at what it was.

And this was what we discovered:



WTF? A PLASTIC BALL inside the can? WTF is it, a moth ball?

Here's a closer look (forgive the blur pictures, I WAS a little high at the time I took the pictures... very unsteady hands ehhehe) at what Suyin calls it the 'bebola terapung ajaib':



After a few minutes of wondering what the hell it was, we decided to check out the can, and discovered this note on it:



in case it's too blur to read, here's what the mesage says:

"Contains new floating widget to give Kilkenny an even smoother taste and creamier head. Widget may rattle in can."

Hmmm... a little Wiki-ing then revealed more information on the magical floating widget:

A widget is a device placed in a container of beer to manage the characteristics of the beer's head. (from Wikipedia)

Ooooh... so THAT's what it is. I wonder why I've never seen that before. Maybe it's because I don't drink Guinness. And have only ever drank Kilkenny draught. Oh well, you learn something new everyday, eh?

Friday, 11 April 2008

Pixar Rolls Out With New Cars and Toys!

As most of you probably know, I'm a bit of a nutjob when it comes to Pixar. So when I read this story on Empire Online about Disney's upcoming movies until the year 2012, I was almost jumping for joy.



Wall-E! Up! Toy Story 3 in 2010! Plus Newt AND Bear and The Bow are BOTH coming out in 2011... yes, you got that right, TWO Pixar movies in a year! Have I died and gone to Pixar heaven? (BTW, those last two are gonna be directed by new directors from the Pixar stable, so let's hope those turn out well).

Nevertheless, the one movie I'm really looking forward to is this one:



CARS 2! Woohoo!!!

Yes yes, I am aware that me and Suanie's nephew Ryan are probably the only two people on Earth who have watched Cars over and over again for god knows how many times. It's just that I think that Cars is actually the most underrated Pixar movie ever. Somehow eveyrone I've asked has rated Cars as their least favorite Pixar movie.

It's not that it's a BAD movie, but I think expectations of Pixar movies have been raised so high that when they came up with Cars, it felt too... ordinary and mundane. Well, it certainly may not have blown everyone's mind the way Finding Nemo or The Incredibles did, but Cars certainly was entertaining, and like all the other Pixar movies, has the ability to captivate you and capture your attention from the word GO (or in this case SPEED).

Anyway, like I said, I'm quite enamoured with Cars, to the extent that I've actually gone out and bought almost every single die-cast Car that's been produced so far (with the exception of a few bloody American exclusives). And here they are!

First up, the Lightning McQueen team! (with a mini Dinoco helicopter!)



Yes, theyre a bit dusty. so sue me.

Next, the Radiators springs gang, complete with tractor, Ferarri and the gang of four punks who put Mack to sleep!



And finally, the cars you see at the Piston Cup!



I still regret not getting all those Cars playsets with the Radiator Springs buildings. Those would have been great to display my cars with, but oh well...

Oh and that's not all the cars I have. I have a whole lot more in storage, unopened, including the ENTIRE SET of different Lightning McQueens (including one with his tongue sticking out and another with bugs in his er... teeth), and a whole lot more including the Monsters Inc and Toy Story spoofs you saw at the end of the Cars film. Whew! That's a lot of CARS!

Yes, I'm nuts about Cars, can you tell? So you can understand why I'm so happy they're coming up with a sequel to the movie? Sure, it's not gonna come out until at least 2012, so I guess I'll just have to keep collecting those toy cars until then, eh? Wheee!