Wednesday, 22 April 2009

The Old Star Trek Is Dead. May The New Star Trek Live Long And Prosper.

Star Trek
Not a Review.
Or Star Trek Begins.
Or Star Trek Returns.
Or Star Trek 11: The Future Begins.
Or Star Trek Salvation.
Or Star Trek Episode 11: The Romulan Menace
Yes I made those up.
But they could all be true! (Yes, even the Star Wars one)

Because this is Star Trek for the Star Wars generation.
Awesome space battles!
Planetary distruction!
Lots of action!
Lots of explosions!
Lots of aliens!
Pointless Red Suit Death Scenes!
Funky cool spaceships!

So how is the new crew?
New Kirk = Great! And Not The Shat.
New Spock = Nice ears, Sylar!
New Bones = Channeling Old Bones
New Uhura = Hot! No Cleavage rating.
New Sulu = Awesome sword!
New Scotty = Funny!
New Chekov! = Wery wery witty!
New Enterprise = Shiny!

Oooh Jennifer Morrison.
And Winona Ryder!
Eric Bana!
And isn't that the Galvatron guy?
And eh, got Cloverfield monster also?
And Ewoks!
(Ok, it's just that ONE alien that looks like an Ewok...)

I was never a big fan of Star Trek.
But this new movie is pretty damn good.
Not so much pointless walking around and talking,
And certainly no hunts for damn whales.
The Old Trek Is Dead
Along with TNG, Voyager, DS9 etc etc.
May the New Trek prosper at the box office,
And live long enough to make more movies.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I was never a big fan of Star Trek.

And that's exactly why you enjoy this heaping pile of crap. Because you never understood Trek in the first place.