Friday, 28 August 2009

Project Beta: The TV Channel With REAL Bloggers!

What da fark is this? A TV SHOW about BLOGGERS? 'Uncovering Malaysia's Top Bloggers'? Since when did they need 'uncovering' in the first place? The only reason why they ARE so-called 'top bloggers' is because they are ALREADY uncovered, and certainly don't need further 'uncovering'. If anything, some of them (especially the guys) need more covering up. The girls can stay uncovered hur hur hur.

Anyway. Like I said (and asked during the press conference)... do we REALLY need a SHOW about BLOGGERS? Do we really need to know what goes on 'behind the scenes' and in their 'real lives'? Yeah right. As if they ALL go to Sunway Resort on normal days. As if three minutes is enough to show us how their lives are like. What next, 1 minute shows for "Malaysia's Top Twitterers"?

That said, there ARE a couple of bloggers I'd like to see them film. And they wouldn't even have to write a script or bring them to Sunway to film. All you have to do is follow them around and voila! You've got a show! Heck, with THESE guys, you'd get a whole CHANNEL of different genres of shows!

Top Blog-Gear
Genre: Automotive
Subject: Paul Tan

Cars cars and cars. Oh, and more cars. Guest-starring MyHorng as a superstar daredevil stunt driver called The Horng. LOL

Genre: Reality Show
Subject: Suanie
I'd love to see them film her at at Bootcamp (yes Suan, I'm a sadist hahahaha), or complaining while hiking to a waterfall... If you follow her blog regularly, you'll know she's damn sporting and willing to try anything (well, ALMOST anything). Hours of endless entertainment I tell you, not just 3 minutes!

Blogger Gone Wild:
Genre: Shock reality show
Subject: Thirsty Blogger

No need scripts for this guy. Just give him and his friends a lot of booze and let the fun begin! (Guest stars Kimberlycun as 'Chick whose voice gets damn high when she's drunk and then passes out on couch')

Blogprah's Book Club
Genre: Talk show book club
Subject: Bibliobibuli
Recommends good books to everyone. Does not feature Tom Cruise jumping on sofa, but she could get Tash Aw to jump on a stool if you'd like.

Dog Blog Lady
Genre: Pet show
Subject: Kimberlycun
Come take a peek at the life of Kim, who used to have a life, but doesn't now, thanks to her dog EmoCharlie. Watch as she cleans up Charlie's poo! Be thrilled as she rants at restaurants that don't allow dogs! And come learn how to look for a dog-sitter when she needs to go for parties!

Makan-Makan Belog:
Genre: Food
Subject: KYSpeaks

This guy is practically Asian Food Channel all by himself. All he does is EAT EAT and EAT (and complain about taking the LRT to work). Just follow him around with a camera and watch him eat! (Guest star Shaolintiger as token angmoh co-host with better Malaysian accent than most radio DJs.)

So You Think Your Blog Can Party?
Genre: Talent Show
Subject: Fireangel

Give her booze, a dance floor, and she'll fill up the three minutes with non-stop entertainment. She'll even do her Siew Yoke Dance for you if you ask nicely! (for non-Muslims only, ok?). Now, if only she'd actually get back to blogging in the first place...

Genre: Tabloid and entertainment
Her name card says she 'chases rock stars' for a living. And boy is she good at it. Hers could be the kind of show where you stick her backstage in a concert and watch her stalk the rock stars!

Footyblog Focus
Genre: Sports
Subject: Hantubola

Watch as the nutjobs at Hantu Bola get mabuk while watching football and start calling Manure United players twats! Features truly Malaysian football commentary ("KEEPER KAYU!") and brilliant, in-depth match analysis ("CIBAI, THAT LUCAS DAMN USELESS!).

Quaint Eye For The Quaint Blog
Genre: Fashion
Subject: Pinkpau
Features Pinkpau dressing up in different costumes for the entire three minutes. What for? It's a FASHION show, numbskull. Since when do fashion shows need a reason to exist? Besides, she's hot, that's why. hahahaahha.

Life of a Blogger/Journalist
Genre: Nature Documentary
Subject: Eyeris

Follows the life of a blogger-journalist in his natural habitat. Contains EXCITING footage of said blogger pouncing on free doughnuts, devouring free cups of coffee, guzzling beer, and spending a lot of time sitting in front of the computer, sniggering to himself and typing. For the WHOLE three minutes. Because that's what most bloggers are like, no? Oh wait, I'm not a TOP blogger. bah.


eiling lim said...

ooh you've got more interesting plots than the other show! Maybe they'll take a hint and put you up there next!

Lyrical Lemongrass said...

Hilarious! I love your list!