Tuesday, 29 September 2009

Not exactly 9 Reasons to Watch 9



9
Not a review.
No no, not District 9.
And not that Nine movie with all the hot babes singing.
It's the animated feature.
That's not coming to Malaysia, BTW.
Saw this in Singapore with Fireangel.
Who didn't understand the story either.



Maybe it was the old school crappy cinema.
(note to self, don't watch movies in Shaw House Lido's Hall 6.)
(And to that idiot behind me who kept asking... "What is 9 about hah?")
(JUST WATCH THE DAMN MOVIE CAN OR NOT!)
After the movie we were both going HUH?
What happened? Why was it like that?
And why is the cinema so crappy?



Sure, it looks damn good, and the animation is brilliant.
But the whole movie was a bit underwhelming.
And the story a bit 'HUH?' lor.
And the voices not very memorable.
IT sounded like the actors were just reading their lines,
Without bothering to add anything to it.



Anyway, it's actually not a bad movie.
Maybe my expectations were too high.
So many good reviews mar.
It's produced by Tim Burton,
And that Timur "Night/Day Watch" Bekmambetov guy.
And has Elijah Wood, Jennier Connelly, Martin Landau,
John C. Reilly, Crispin Glover...
And oh, Christopher Plummer.
Who seems to be having some fun in CGI animations these days.



Like I said, the story was a bit 'HUH?'
Why were they created in the first place?
Why did they have to do THAT?
Why did THAT have to do THIS?
And if the 9 stitchpunks are what their creator said they are...
Then how in hell did one of them turn out to be a GIRL?



It's a fun movie though.
Not quite as clever as most reviewers have made it out to be,
But it's gorgeously animated,
And it's pretty dark and gloomy.
Probably not exactly one for the kids,
But it IS worth a watch.
Just don't expect too much.



I'd love to see the short film this is based on though.
I bet it was much better.
Especially without the cliched 'star' voices,
And without having to stretch the story to feature length.
Then again, without the movie...
I wouldn't have heard of the short film anyway.
So hurrah for the er... third best animated feature this year!

Thursday, 24 September 2009

Temper Your Muse With XX Passion Pit. Trippy.

I was going through my music library the other day, and realized that I have WAY too many songs to go through. I mean, for 2009 alone, there are 3000 over songs to listen to, more than four DAYS worth.

Therefore, I've decided that the only way I can go through them was to listen to them one album at a time, and separate them by a specific genre every day. Yeah, I tend to be a bit of a stickler for this kind of organization.

Yesterday, for instance, was a Indie Rock kinda day. So my playlist had the following albums:



The Xx is a brilliant little band. Them, and The Temper Trap are probably my favorite new bands for 2009. Passion Pit is not too bad either, though I found it harder to get into. And Yo La Tengo? Like a friend of mine said, the sum of the age of the three bands mentioned above would still not be as old as Yo La Tengo... And they haven't disappointed yet. Don't dig the 13 minutes songs though, guys...

Today, it's a 90's Rock kinda day.



Pearl Jam's new one Backspacer is pretty decent stuff. Not groundbreaking, but it's still easier to get into than their last one, which I totally don't remember at all. Alice In Chains? Can't really tell yet. I'll tell you when I've heard more of it. Third Eye Blind is decent stuff too, but still a lesser shadow of its Semi-Charmed Life days. Ditto Our Lady Peace. Nothing very memorable, really...

Maybe tomorrow, I'll do a Brit Rock kinda day, since I've got the new Muse, Arctic Monkeys, Kasabian and Jarvis Cocker mucking around the iPod. Might even throw in a little Mika... ok, maybe not.



Muse's The Resistance is one great album. Matt Bellamy seems to have gone more Freddie Mercury than usual this time round, one song even sounds a bit like Bohemian Rhapsody. Kasabian's songs here actually sound better than they were live, to tell the truth, though I may have been too tired to enjoy them at the MTV World Stage then. Arctic Monkeys? Great album too. Cornerstone is one of the best songs of the YEAR. And Jarvis Cocker... I'll tell you when I listen to it again tomorrow k? haha.

BTW, I was trying out something yesterday. This is seriously trippy:

1) Sort your iTunes songs according to 'Time'
2) Starting with the song with the SHORTEST time, start playing the playlist IN SEQUENCE.
3) Doesn't matter how short it is, or what it is, just play EVERYTHING in sequence.

This makes for a really trippy listening experience. Within the five minutes, I had Homer Simpson singing Spider Pig, the Theme frome Life, some voice-overs, some weird Janet Jackson interludes, Eminem cussing, and some weird instrumental shit from the likes of Beirut and Sufjan Stevens.

Once you get to the one minute and above 'songs', the actual songs start comign in, but everything before that is just serious weird shit.

Yes, I have too much time and too many mp3s. So sue me.

Wednesday, 23 September 2009

Parody It Like Pratchett!

Heads up, Pratchett fans. IT's that time of year again!

Yes, our beloved nutty writer will be releasing a new DISCWORLD book next month!



Ok, that is one ugly ass cover. Forget that one. I'm getting THIS one instead!



As you'd probably noticed from the above cover, the story's apparently gonna parody FOOTBALL, so this should be one cracker of a book. My money's on the Librarian being the goalkeeper.

I wonder what position Rincewind's gonna be in though. And will he be running away from the ball a lot? Count on it.

Friday, 18 September 2009

Get Lost, You Damn Brown Symbol

I was at Kinokuniya this morning, and this book was all over the place:



Has anyone read the damn book yet?
Who does it offend this time?
Are the lines as bad as the worst Dan Brown lines ever?
Is the plot generated from the same Dan Brown Sequel Generator?
Does anyone think it's the greatest book ever written?
Does anyone feel compelled to go visit Washington and look for the symbols?

More importantly, was anyone suckered into buying the bloody expensive hardcover on the first day? SUCKAS!!!!!

Thursday, 17 September 2009

(50) Reasons Why This is THE Best Romantic Comedy of the Year



(500) Days of Summer
Not a Review.
Here're (50) reasons you should watch this.
No, not on DVD or downloaded.
IN THE CINEMA.
Because small, brilliant films like this deserve to make more money.



1) Zooey Deschanel
2) It's a rom-com, but NOT a rom-com.
3) It's like the ANTI-rom-com
4) This is not a love story
5) But it IS a story about love
6) It's WAAAY better than The Ugly Truth
7) It's WAAAY better than The Proposal
8) Heck, it's WAAAY better than any rom-com this year



9) Like, no fairytale meetings,
10) No far-fetched plots to get the two together
11) No I-hate-you-you-hate-me-but-we-are-actually-in-love plot
12) It feels real and familiar
13) It feels like something YOU've been through.
14) or at least, something I went through
15) And it is one bittersweet, quirky, magical journey.



16) It'll make you happy
17) It'll make you sad
18) It'll make you laugh
19) It'll make you tear up
20) It'll make you wanna yell BITCH!
21) It'll make you singalong
22) It'll make you sigh for Tom's broken heart



23) It's quirky and inventive,
24) It's got some brilliant jokes
25) It's got some awesome gimmicks
26) And it's got pretty damn good acting
27) It's got Cobra Commander!
28) Best of all, it's got Zooey Deschanel



29) Zooey Deschanel's smile
30) Zooey Deschanel's voice
31) Zooey Deschanel's eyes
32) Zooey Deschanel's singing
33) Zooey Deschanel's laugh
34) Zooey Deschanel's heartbreakingly melancholic look
35) Zooey Deschanel's apartment
36) Zooey Deschanel's knees



37) Oh, and the music's brilliant too.
38) The Smiths
39) Belle and Sebastian
40) Simon & Garfunkel
41) Feist
42) Black Kids



43) Because nothing is pre-destined - it's all coincidence
44) Because if you've been in love before, you'll like this
45) Because if you've been heartbroken before, you'll like this
46) Because all of us have been through the same things before
47) Because sometimes you need to remember the bad parts as well.
48) Because life is full of ups and downs and love found and love lost.
49) Because life ain't like what Hollywood rom-coms makes it out to be.
50) Because if you don't watch it, I'll call you a bitch.

Wednesday, 16 September 2009

Jack White Falls In Love With a LEGO Girl

I'm a real sucker for cool LEGO stuff. And it don't get cooler than LEGO versions of Jack White and Iggy Pop:



These avatars are for the upcoming LEGO Rock Band game. Damn, now I REALLY want that PS3...

That Jack White really is crazy, isn't he? From White Stripes to Raconteurs to Dead Weather to Lorenna McKennit to whatever else, now he's a LEGO man. And Iggy Pop's shirtless LEGO man is a lot better looking than his real life self, I must say. Hehe.

Who next, I wonder? I'd LOVE to get my grubby hands on some actual KISS LEGO men, a LEGO Marilyn Manson, and LEGO Beatles. And I wonder if Kurt Cobain would object to being a LEGO man... heh heh.

In other news, Death Cab For Cutie writes new song for New Moon. Like Reta says, now kids are gonna think they are cool because they listened to the soundtrack. But never mind Death Cab For Cutie... what the fuck is THOM YORKE doing writing songs for that high school vampire crap?

The most brilliantly designed poster for one of the most anticipated movies of 2010...

Behold!
A poster for one of the most anticipated movies of 2010!
From the geniuses who brought you Up and WALL-E!
It will be great!
It will be brilliant!
It will be simply astounding!
It will come from infinity and beyond!
It will be.... eh?

THAT'S IT?



Bah.

Tuesday, 15 September 2009

F1Malaysia! Satu Dreber, Satu Kereta!



F1Malaysia! Satu Dreber, Satu Kereta!

We are now open for applications for the driver's position for 1Malaysia's very special team next season!

If you:

1) ...are Malaysian (doesn't matter which race, as long as can race),
2) ...have a drivers license (kopi-o lesen also can),
3) ...drive a Proton or Perodua (enginF1 Buatan Malaysia mar),
4) ...can drive from KL-Penang in under 2 hours (without jam),
4) ...are not Alex Yoong,

Then you are welcome to apply.

How to apply:

Very easy. Just drive as fast as you can on the North-South highway this coming balik kampung. Our highly trained professional scouts will be stationed under flyovers along the highway, armed with high-tech speed tra... er.. speed detectors which will capture your speed and technique and then report it to our equally highly trained officials stationed further down the road, who will flag you down to sama... er.. congratulate you!

If selected, all you have to do is pay the official a small fee for er.. service tax (RM50 cukup, lipat kecik kecik, yeah?) and you could be selected to be our F1Malaysia driver! Special consideration will be given to those who can do the KL-Penang trip back during balik kampung time in less than 3 hours!

So what are you waiting for! Apply now and you could be representing F1Malaysia in the F1 next season!

RIP: Patrick Swayze, Dirty Dancer, Point Breaker and er... Ghostly Potterer.



Sigh... this year has really been a year of obituaries.

Patrick Swayze dies at 57

Patrick Swayze, the hunky actor who danced his way into viewers' hearts with "Dirty Dancing" and then broke them with "Ghost," died Monday after a battle with pancreatic cancer. He was 57.

He wasn't exactly the most memorable of actors in my book, but I DO remember him best for Dirty Dancing, Point Break and Ghost (and to some extent, Donnie Darko, but Jake was more memorable in that. So was the giant bunny).

Those movies were pure, pop entertainment, and it was great fun watching them when I was a kid. Ok, so Point Break was cheesy as hell (and Keanu kayu as hell). So I didn't really wanted to dance after Dirty Dancing. But heck, watching that pottery scene in Ghost made me wanna take up pottery as well. Ok maybe not, but it did make me wanna take up Demi Moore. Hur hur.

So here's to you, Patrick Swayze, Bunny Botherer, Dirty Dancer, Point Breaker and er... Ghostly Potterer. Thanks for those movies. Nobody's gonna put Baby in a corner now. So go ride that wave, dude.

Monday, 14 September 2009

Point Form Filler: Kanye, Oasis, Federer, Pixar and er... Liow Tiong Lai.

I'm too busy (and lazy to blog) So let's do this in point form

1) So Kanye West stormed the stage, stole Taylor Swift's limelight, and made the poor girl cry. Apara, making a little girl cry. It's just the VMAs, yo. Not even the Grammys or something more relevant. LOL. Sure, Beyoncé's video IS better (well, she looks hotter in it, at least), but don't lar make little girl cry. Besides, if he'd waited a while longer, he'd have no cause to storm the stage and make an ass out of himself in the first place. After all, Beyoncé won VIDEO OF THE YEAR (and she even gave Swift a second chance to give her speech. Now THAT'S one classy babe.)

2) Pixar and Disney news! Timothy "I was James Bond" Dalton will be in Toy Story 3, along with Whoopi "Whoopie!" Goldberg, Bonnie Hunt. The rest of the cast is still around. The Cars 2 story was also announced. Looks like the gang will be traveling to Japan, Germany, Italy and London for races. Lots of racing parodies to come, I hope. There's also gonna be a new Winnie And the Pooh movie as well.... Er. Ok. Moving on...

3) Also from Empire Online, Pirates of the Caribbean 4 will apparently be called Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides. Empire reckons it might be Monkey Island-esque. I say, Forget Jack Sparrow... Bring on Guybrush Threepwood!

4) Heard the new Muse album yet? Matt Bellamy seems to be channeling Freddie Mercury on this one. One of the songs on The Resistance reminded me A LOT of Bohemian Rhapsody...

5) So Noel Gallagher quit Oasis. Ho hum. He's done this before lar. And besides, Oasis' albums have pretty much sucked after (What's The Story) Morning Glory anyway...

6) Two more 15Malaysia videos are up. Duit Kecil is a bit blah. But check out Healthy Paranoia, featuring Health Minister Liow Tiong Lai!

7) And on to sports now. Is THIS the best tennis shot EVER or what?

Wednesday, 9 September 2009

15Malaysia: Wash Eyes and Eat Wind Bersama Taxi KJ!

Sorry about the lack of updates. I'm on leave currently, and who's got time to blog when you're on leave eh?

Anyway, 15Malaysia's latest film - Meter is up:



Featuring the infamous Khairy Jamaluddin, Amber Chia, Jason Lo and a few others, it's about this taxi driver who rants about everything from football to language and what not.

Last I checked, the 15Malaysia site was still down, so if you're curious to see how Khariry Jamaluddin fares as a taxi driver ranting about Malaysian football, go to the video on YouTube HERE.


There've also been two other films - Slovak Sling (featuring Harith Iskandar, Patrick Teoh and a pretty funny DVD seller), and James Lee's Gerhana (which you might wanna have a cup of coffee before watching...).

Go check them out (or not) when the site is back up!

Thursday, 3 September 2009

MA-LAY-SI-A! FUCK YEAH!



MA-LAY-SI-A! FUCK YEAH!
(Sung to the tune of America, Fuck Yeah!)

MA-LAY-SI-A! FUCK YEAH!
U-turning round to save the awesome Arthur's Day yeah!
MA-LAY-SI-A! FUCK YEAH!
Guinness is the only way yeah!

By the time the Black Eye Peas are through,
We all can have a pint or two!

MA-LAY-SI-A! FUCK YEAH!
So lick that head and suck some Black Stuff ,
MA-LAY-SI-A! FUCK YEAH!
Whatcha' gonna do when your pint is through now?

It's the drink that we all share,
It's the stout for tomorroooooow!!!!
FUCK YEAH!

Mat Rempit
! FUCK YEAH!
Steven's Corner! FUCK YEAH!
Jimmy Choo
! FUCK YEAH!
Lee Chong Wei! FUCK YEAH!
EPL! FUCK YEAH!
Alleycats! FUCK YEAH!
Streamyx! FUCK YEAH!
ISA
! FUCK YEAH!

FUCK YEAH!

MLTR
! FUCK YEAH!
Old Town White Coffee! FUCK YEAH!
Obama! FUCK YEAH!
Astro! FUCK YEAH!
Chua Soi Lek! FUCK YEAH!
Air Asia! FUCK YEAH!
Toddy! FUCK YEAH!
KLCC! FUCK YEAH!
Orangutans! FUCK YEAH!
Samy Vellu! ... er.. fuck yeah.... fuck yeah...

Assam Laksa
! FUCK YEAH!
Traffic jams! FUCK YEAH!
Gila-Gila! FUCK YEAH!
Amber Chia! FUCK YEAH!
Genting Highlands! FUCK YEAH!
Holidays! FUCK YEAH!
Foreign Workers! FUCK YEAH!
DVD! FUCK YEAH!
Hannah Yeoh! FUCK YEAH!
Kennysia! er.. fuck yeah.... fuck yeah...
1Malaysia....
Lat!

Wednesday, 2 September 2009

15Malaysia: One Future. No Voices.

Tan Chui Mui's One Future is up now on 15Malaysia.com:



I have to say, when I first saw this during the launch on the big screen, I was slightly put off by the jerky frame by frame style. But watching it again here, on a small PC screen, it seems smoother.

Can't fault the story though. Where the rest of the shorts have gone for comedy, drama, and even pretentiousness, this one is a short but nevertheless rather cool pseudo-science-fiction dystopian alternate reality Malaysia, where everyone lives in peace and harmony but are not allowed to speak.

Hey, maybe it isn't THAT alternate a reality after all...

Anyway, check it out. It's got Ida Nerina and politician Tian Chua in it too. And it's also got one heck of a subtle message (which really isn't so subtle, but you get the point).

And while you're at it, go check out the previous two shorts - The Son and Lumpur as well. I won't promise you'll LIKE them, but go support anyway lah...

Click below to go to the 15MAlaysia films page...

Tuesday, 1 September 2009

Smurf Me! More Megan's Body!

We now interrupt your regular scheduled blogging to bring you more gratuitous pictures of MEgan Fox in Jennifer's Body. Behold, the movie posters...



And if you thought THAT was hot, check out the Spanish one...



Oooh. FOXEH.

What, don't like Megan Fox? What are you, gay? (don't bother answering if you're female)

Well here are some cool... no, make that VERY cool posters for Roland Emmerich's latest ploy to destroy the world. I mean, his new film.









This last one is KILLER, I tell you. I'd LOVE to have all four hanging in my living room, though considering my apartment's past shenanigans with water, I'm not sure it'll send out a good vibe.

Anyway, there're some adaptations of anime coming our way as well, starting with the upcoming Astroboy-who-doesn't-look-Japanese:



And the adpatation of Gatchaman, also known as G-Force (NO, NOT the the one with Hamsters):



And last, but not least (well, it IS least for me, I don't know about YOU), we have a new movie on.... SMURFS.



Oh dear. What the SMURF is this???

Spider-mouse! The Incredible Dulk! Disney Marvel Crossovers!

I woke up this morning to the news that Disney has bought Marvel for USD BILLION.

Yes, believe it, people, the Mouse owns Spidey's ass now, and there's nothing we can do about it.

You gotta admit though, this throws up all sorts of possibilities. No I couldn't care less about all the business business bits. I'm talking about how seeing as Disney owns Marvel, Pixar AND their own Disney characters, think of all the FUN they could have with crossovers!

Imagine...

1) Spider-mouse - A mouse with unusually large ears is bitten by a HUGE radioactive spider (huge to the mouse, that is). He gains special powers - growing to human being-size, gains the ability to talk (in a VERY squeaky voice) and to stick on walls that are not covered with rat poison. With great powers come great merchandising rights, so Spider-mouse goes on to use those powers to drive a steamboat, woo Minnie Mouse, and sell merchandise by the billions. Also guest stars

2) The Incredible Dulk
A mild-mannered duck accidently flies into a gamma ray testing field while escaping some hunters, and is turned into a GIANT GREEN MONSTER (with a beak) who starts throwing tantrums and goes after the hunters yelling "QUACLK SQUESSSSH!!!!" Surprisingly, while the rest of his body turns green, his beak remains yellow. Also, he ends up wearing ONLY a shirt (no pants) which seems to magically expand as he grows bigger.

3) The Fantasia Four Four characters - a mouse, a duck, a goofy-looking dog, and an orange dog are one a road trip in an RV when it is hit by cosmic rays. They then get superpowers (as usual). The mouse gains the ability to command brooms and expand his ears like a rubber mat and calls himself Mr. Fantasia. The duck can turn invisible (but strangely, his beak remains visible). Goofy can turn himself into a living bonfire, which comes in real handy when the gang are roasting marshmallows during their road trips. And Pluto? He gets turned into an orange rock.

4) Plutolt
All his life, Pluto thought he was a superdog. He never seemed to die or get injured when he fell down wells, got hit by large rocks and anvils, or when he smashed into trees while chasing chipmunks. Then he gets lost one day and discovers that he was just a very lucky dog. He then has to find his way home accompanied by two talking chipmunks, an Arisocat, and 101 Dalmations.

5) Toy Story 2.5: The Attack of the Superhero Action Figures
A completely stand-alone story set in between the events of Toy Story 2 and 3, this movie sees Woody, Buzz and gang having to defend themselves and Andy's Room from an attack by Sid's new Marvel Legends superhero action figures. Features Rex the dinosaur headbutting The Incredible Hulk! Woody using his puppet strings against Spider-man! Buzz uses his karate-chop grip against Iron Man (with swinging punch action)! The Little Green Army Men gang up against the Wasp and Ant Man! Little Bo Peep using her staff to whack a plastic Emma Frost (with a face sculpt that looks like a transvestite)! And the greatest battle of them all... Mr. Potatohead taking on Spider-Spud!