Friday, 18 February 2011

Brought To You By The Number Four. Three! Two! One! Arkh arkh arkh!

I Am Number Four.
Not A review.
Why Number Four, I wonder.
Why not Number Five?
Or Six, Seven, Eight and Nine?
Is it so they can make I Am Number Five,
I Am Number Six, and so on?

It's like some typical teenage high school flick.
Dumb jocks, science nerds, cheerleaders,
Lots of puppy love and googly eyes,
But with added aliens and super powers.

But yo, That Number Four has the best power EVER.
He's got... torchlight hands!
Yes, his hands have built-in torchlights!
How cool is that?
He'll never have trouble looking for his seat in a cinema!
And he can study even when there's a blackout!

Oooh, it's that pregnant cheerleader from Glee.
She's pretty hot.
Though I kept expecting her to burst out in song.
"Yoouuu light up my life..."
"With the torchliiiiights...."
"Shining from your haaaaands"

Ok, the actual songs in it were pretty cool.
Got Adele, The XX and even Jimmy Eat World!
And at least the actors weren't doing the singing.
And there was no lion and lamb cringing Twilight shit.
Though the main actor is a bit kayu though.
The new Keanu maybe?

It's ok only lah.
Decent action, pretty nice effects.
But you have to sit through all that high school crap to get to it.
I wonder if they really ARE making a sequel.
Are they gonna call it He Is Number Five?
Or maybe She Ain't Number Six?
Or how about Do We Have To Make Movie Number Two?


rita said...

clearly you're too old for this kind of movie.

eyeris said...

Lemme guess... fan of Twilight? :D

Han said...

I suspected as much it'll be a bunch of highschool/teen hormone driven show. Will check it out next week to validate your not a review :)

Simon Seow said...

It's number four because there will only be 10 minutes to tell the story if it's number eleven