Thursday, 28 March 2013

HOOH HAH? What happened to good old YO JOE?



GI Joe: Retaliation.
Not a review.
The Rock and John McClane.. Together at last!
HOOH HAH!!!
Wait a sec...
"Hooh hah?"
Whatever happened to good old "YO JOE!"???



ALL HAIL THE ROCK.
The Rock is awesome.
The Rock kicks ass like no other.
The Rock has arms as big as a tank's turret.
The Rock can revive ANY franchise,
Even those that have hit Rock Bottom (heh heh)



All hail Cobra!
Ok, maybe not.
But hail the fact that he's got his proper mask back, at least.
And his awesome world destroying weapon is called.... HISS!
Now THAT'S the Cobra Commander we know!
I wish they'd brought back The Baroness though.
She was awesome. And hot, of course.



Wah they really got rid of almost EVERYONE from the first movie huh?
And added The Rock and John McClane samore.
Which actually made this more awesome than the first one.
At least there was none of that "Acceleration Suit" nonsense.
This was good old fashioned guns, fists and explosions.
And ninjas of course.
Ninjas are always awesome.



OF COURSE Snake Eyes is still in it.
Come on, it wouldn't be a GI JOE movie without Snake Eyes, right?
He still kicks ass, obviously.
But hor, for a ninja, he doesn't seem very stealthy lor.
Made so much noise that even Roadblock heard him.



Oooh hot chick.
Hot chick with guns!
Hot chick in a gratuitous cleavage-baring dress!
(Cleavage Rating: 8.5)
Hot chick in a gratuitous clothes changing scene!
Ohh, and ANOTHER hot chick.. with swords!
I still miss The Baroness though.



GUNS! EXPLOSIONS! FIGHTS!
A NINJA FIGHT ON A MOUNTAINSIDE!
TANKS! BIG ONES!
LONDON GETTING DESTROYED!
KINETIC HARPOONS!
Now that's good action!



Oklah, the movie quite entertaining.
As long as no one was trying to start a conversation.
The plot, dialogue were rather meh.
But there were some good one-liners from The Rock and John McClane.
Hey Bruce, this movie is better than that last Die Hard.
Jsut stick to this franchise, and forget that other one, ok?
Yippie kay yay, General Joe.

No comments: