Friday, 5 July 2013

Somebody Hi-Ho the Hero Away Please



The Lone Ranger.
Not a review.
HI-HO SILVER, AWAY!
DADADUM, DADADUM, DADADUMDUMDUM!
DADADUM, DADADUM, DADADUMDUMDUM!
DADADUM, DADADUM, DADADUMDUMDUM!
DADA-DAAAH DADADUMDUMDUM!



Damn that bloody theme song.
Couldn't get it out of my head for days.
But the moment it comes on during the movie,
I just had this MASSIVE STUPID GRIN on my face.
The music plus the awesome finale was GREAT.
Too bad it took so damn long to get there though.



This is like Pirates of the Carribean,
But set in the Wild Wild West.
Pirates of the Wilw Wild West, anyone?
And it's not just because there's Johnny Depp.



Johnny Depp was great BTW.
Come on, it's JOHNNY DEPP.
He's always good, even if the movie is not.
Tonto was like droll and less manic Jack Sparrow.
And stole every scene he was in.
Which is more than I can say about the Lone Ranger.



ARGH I know he is supposed to be all morally upright,
But did the Lone Ranger have to be so morally UPTIGHT?
He is so annoyingly self-righteous,
That sometimes I wished they'd just just Hi Ho him away.
Heck, I liked the HORSE more than hero here.
(The horse is awesome, BTW).



Remember I said this was like POTC?
Just replace Orlando Bloom with ARnie HAmmer,
Jack Sparrow with Tonto,
Geoffery Rush for Butch Cavendish,
And voila! Pirates of the Wild Wild West!



Ok that's oversimplifying things,
But everything seemed so... familiar,
The action was great, the story, not so great.
But at least Johnny Depp was great,
And THAT THEME SONG.
Come on, you know how it goes!



DADADUM, DADADUM, DADADUMDUMDUM!
DADADUM, DADADUM, DADADUMDUMDUM!
DADADUM, DADADUM, DADADUMDUMDUM!
DADA-DAAAH DADADUMDUMDUM!

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